You gave him a second chance and he blew it – you will never be happy dating a man you cannot trust. You deserve better. You say you broke up with him before but couldn’t live without him… breaking up with someone is never easy, but just think of all the unhappiness and upset he’s caused you, rather than dwelling on the things you’ll miss about him. Make a clean break and fill your time with lots of stuff you love doing, and gradually it will get easier.