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April Masini › Relationship Advice Forum › Relationship Advice Forum › 2 Women In Love With Me…. HELP

2 Women In Love With Me…. HELP

April Masini › Relationship Advice Forum › Relationship Advice Forum › 2 Women In Love With Me…. HELP

Viewing 3 posts - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)
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  • September 20, 2010 at 11:40 am #3069
    relationshipa1
    Keymaster

    First off, I am over 40 years old and divorced. [b]I am also in love with both women [/b]as well and do not know who to choose and I must choose one because it is not fair to them and I feel sooooo bad for both women.

    The first women, “DM” is my long time girlfriend for amost 2 years. She is married still, separated and we met when we were both separated. She is not getting a divorce now because she found out that her husband is dieing of stage 4 cancer and has 18 months to 2 years max to live. A few months back she moved several hundred miles away from me to take care of him and let her kids visit with him during his last few month or years alive. She lives with him in the same home now and we see each other 2-3 times a month. Her husband knows about me and does not mind. Yet, I refuse to stay the night in her home with him there. Plus, I have no idea when she is coming back and I feel bad now because we are just waiting for him to die. It’s sort of sick. Plus, our relationship was up and down prior to her moving away.

    In the meantime, I met “CD”, she is a wonderful women who lives nearby and we fell in love. “CD” know of “DM” and lets me continue my relationship with her for the time being, however she is getting very impatient. “CD” wants me to leave “DM” and build a relationship with her and eventually get married. “CD” is seeing other men now because I have another women and she says it’s only fair.

    Both women will not let go of me. I’ve tried to break it off with both women because of my confusion and they don’t let go. However, “DM” is worse because of the length of our relationship and the eminent death of her husband looming.

    I feel soooo bad for cheating on “DM” because I feel like she is my soulmate and leaving her is unimaginable to me. Yet I love another. What should I do?

    September 21, 2010 at 6:21 pm #15752
    womenknowledge
    Participant

    Wow! I don’t know you but if this was in my case, I will to have make decision here what is and who is it I want. I don’t want to criticize because I don’t know your situation and you but it seems kind of like confusion going like to you said. Ok my friend first of all, the other woman MD is married and the husband is sick but she wants to date you at the same time. So ask yourself, kind of love can she possibly be in with you? If the husband dies and we don’t want that happens and she decided to marry you and you get sick don’t you think she could do the same thing to you? So you have question her about what she want. If you are honest call for a meeting between your and tell her to give each other space so she can look after her husband health because that’s what really important right now and see what she has to say from a moral view point. You must also make up your mind wish one of the women you really love or date both to decide who you connect with the best. For CD, you also have to question her motive. If she really in love with you while would she want to revenge by date someone else? You and her haven’t start any serious relationship yet and she already satisfacts her needs by going out with somebody. Do you think she can keep real a relationship when things get heat up? Real is patient and not rush. She seems to be rushing into a relationship with and you don’t want that. It’s a though decision to make but you have ask yourself what really important you and kind person you want in your life. Hope this will help you in your decision making process.

    September 21, 2010 at 10:47 pm #15237
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    The real question I have for you is: Do you want to get married or just date one or both — or more than two or three women? I don’t get the feeling you want to get married from what you’ve written. Therefore, if DM understands that you’re living separate lives until she’s more available, I think it’s okay for you to play the field – if not with CD then with someone else or other women.

    Although you have a relationship and feelings for DM, the reality is she is not available now and maybe not for several more years. Clearly, you aren’t interested in waiting for her without dating, so I think you have to be true to yourself and let DM go. She has a lot on her plate now, and surely, she will understand why you are moving on.

    I hope that helps. Let us all know how it goes. And please join me on Facebook. Here’s the link for AskApril.com on Facebook: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958&v=wall[/url]. 🙂

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