[brandon]

So it’s May, last month of high school, and I’m ready to graduate! I have never really had a girlfriend in high school for a few reasons(well 3 days once). Well there is this girl in 2 of my classes who has never said a word(nearly) and her name is…. Selina(hey what the heck if she finds this, that doesn’t mean anything). We have a lot of mutual friends and one of my best friends was in an on/off relationship for all 4 years of high school(more on that later), and so I’m like hey what the heck I’ll poke her on Facebook. So we start a war. That progresses onto conversations…. Anyways I’m an idiot an text way more then I should and we texted like crazy for a few weeks! I was always the one to initiate it, for every text she made, I made 3-4. Then later we went for two days with her best friend(a girl) and one of my best friends(as well as hers, he’s gay so nothing going on there) on a 2 day stint going to lake, drive in theater, mall, etc. and had an awesome time! This happened in early June… Well I develop a crush over that time and ask her best friend(which I am indifferent to this decision) if she, ya know, liked me? She said yes, but wanted to take things slow… Because she broke up with my old friend a month ago, but Selina said she saw this day I had planned for us as a date!  And later was told she was excited about the “date” the whole week! I was so excited, I can’t remember many other moments in my life when I was this excited! It was going to be the beginning of something amazing! So I thought….

Well I try and plan ahead for the few hours we will hang out, Selina considered this as a date and she likes me so I thought what could go wrong? Ya know? Well her friend says she loves Orange Chicken from local Chinese restaurant… So that was taken into consideration. I did so much research and ended up with this picnic idea! Okay so I have it all planned out! Make picnic food, bring blanket and cooler and maybe get some of her favorite food on the way there and see a movie after! I was just trying to avoid the cliche at all costs(aside from movie, which was more of a maybe/iffy). So I get to her house, more excited then ever, and knock on her door and meet her mom(who is the friendliest person in the world! Mind you she’s Danish do her English was slightly broken). So I told her the plan for the night(her dad was out of town) and she was alright with it and all. So we leave and go out to my Jeep…. Well I took my dog too, because she wanted him to come… And open the door for her and all to be a gentleman. Okay, anyways…. We set off and grab some of her favorite food ever(according to her best friend) and she doesn’t act very excited. 

Okay(I thought) and so we headed towards the local duck pond for the picnic and talked on the way(she was super nice and acted interested, not uncomfortable)… I didn’t tell her where we are going, just that it would be a surprise! So we pull up and I get out and pull the cooler out and we head towards a shaded tree. We have the sandwiches I made, fruits/vegetables(she’s a diabetic), and the Chinese food. Well we sit down, talk a little… (edit: on the drive there: she said she was hanging out with another guy the next day! Who does that?! I mean really?)She tells me about how she found out she had diabetes and I let her talk and listen intently. Well halfway through, there is a moment where she just stares off into the distance and murmurs,”I want to go home”…. My heart instantly sinks and I melt into a puddle of mud. That set the tone for the rest of the date…. All in all she didn’t end up eating any…. Yes any of the sandwiches I made myself, the fruits, the vegetables, or even her “favorite” Chinese food. And the bread i brought to feed the ducks, well they flew off before we had the chance. I ask her if she wants to go see a movie and she says no and that she feels bad(yeah, we know what that means, even if there is truth in it). So I drop her off at home and we say bye and stuff… 

When shes gone, yes I know this sounds cheesy and ridiculous, I feel like a sinking hole in my heart. I have never done this much for any girl. Well come to find out she started talking to this guy(who started dating this very girl who told me this, who I had a crush on at the time)  the day before our date. When I found this out everything started to make sense…. She said there wasnt really a “click”, probably because she wasn’t thinking about me. Probably thinking about this guy who drives her dream car(a brand new Camaro). Well I just wanted to share this little story, thank you for reading. 

-She has not initiated a text since before the date(which was 3 weeks ago). When she does text back it’s short, and nearly 8 hours after I sent one, and with no emoticons like we used to do. 

-I have tried to stay positive and I feel like I have moved on, but it’s so disheartening when everything is so perfect, planned out, and it just falls apart and collapses within a matter of hours…. You know, especially when halfway through a date, she murmurs that she wants to leave… That crushed me. Okay, time to move on and don’t text too much. :/ Or keep giving her space and keep hope?[list][/list]

[brandon]

I forgot to add that she helped me get a job at where she works(where I know several other people too) and we see each other on a regular basis and still talk some…..

[April Masini]

My advice is to take the rejection as a gift. In the bigger picture, you want to be with someone who really wants to be with you — not everyone will, and you won’t want to be with everyone who wants you, either. Sometimes you’re just not someone’s cup of tea — and vice verse. I know you’re disappointed that she didn’t want what you wanted, but it’s much better to find out and move on, then to continue to invest (especially when you invest so much) in the wrong person. Dating is a process and you’ll find that this will happen again in the future with someone else, but you’ll have a lot more experience under you’re belt and you’ll realize that it wasn’t meant to be….. next!

The date sounds really lovely — find Ms. Right — someone who wants to be on a date with you and will really appreciate all your great qualities! 😀

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url]http://www.facebook.com/april.masini.9[/url][/b]

[Author]

Posts