[honey85]

I was dating this guy on and off for 7 months. We broke up 2 months ago. About a week ago he found out I was dating someone else and called me and told me he wants to go out for coffee and talk about us because he is scared of loosing me to this new guy.

Ok, now something about our relationship: the entire time we took things slow (per his request) because he wanted to make things work. Nothing wrong with that but we never saw each other. We spoke on the phone every night for hours but only saw each other about once a week. Then every time I tried to talk about serious things he would crawl back into his shell. He says he is scared of getting hurt again. I tell him all the time how much I care and try to make him feel secure and trust me that I would never hurt him but it just doesn’t work.

So now he wants to go to get coffee. “Nothing more nothing less” he says. I know he wants to try to make things work but the fact that it’s just a coffe nothing more nothing else make me think nothing has changed. He’s stilll going to want to do things his way and go at his speed and we would eventually break up again.

I don’t understand him. I know he cares but for some reason can’t move forward with me. What should i do? Should I go back and do things his way hoping we would work out or do I try to get over him?
Please help me I am so confused!!!

[April Masini]

Forget coffee. You’ve got a great new boyfriend, now. You gave this last guy 7 months of your time! And now he’s sorry he lost you, but he’s still doing things his way — coffee, nothing more and nothing less isn’t much of an offer to a woman who’s already given him 7 months! Coffee with an engagement ring and a heartfelt apology — now that’s an offer I’d urge you to consider. But coffee with milk, sugar on the side — no thanks! 😉

You’re right to ask the question, Can I date a commitment-phone? And my answer to you is no. You can’t. You’d be wasting your time.

You want a commitment, so you need to date men who are compatible with your needs. [i]Lots of men[/i] [b][i]do[/i][/b] want commitments! Dating won’t work for you unless you’re compatible with your partner, and commitment is a deal breaker.

So be nice when you turn your ex-boyfriend down for coffee! And have a great week with your new boyfriend! 😀

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