Crazy obesession

[Tzeeyamin]

Hi, My problem is very unique and none of my mates have ever encoutered with such issue. My friend(female) had a very serious relationship 4 years ago. She was dead-set on marrying him. But he dumped her. She got really upset , she stopped eating and was on the verge of developing stomach ulcer. Just then in our university she spotted a handsome guy who was similar to the ideals she had in mind–tall, handsome etc. She started gathering basic information about him.he is 4 years older than her. She was very nervous to talk to him so I pretended that i am her and talked to him on facebook. I initiated their friendship then left the rest to her. She would share all the text messages from him with me and ask me for advices. I acted like a mentor. He was secretive so we both tried to find out about him through various other people and contacts. He then asked her to be his casual girlfriend not even exclusive. She asked for a serious relationship because of her past experience which he refused.now they are not talking to each other but [b] Me and My Friend[/b] are obsessed with him all we do is talk about him only. I also see him in my dreams often. My friend’s obsession is quite understandable but why am I obsessed? Its like our conversations are incomplete if we dont mention his name for once. I am worried about myself and I love my friend. I dont have feelings for this guy but i see him in every person when I walk on the street. Help me!

[April Masini]

It makes sense that you’re interested in him because you’re all single, about the same age, and you and your friend both have relationships with him — even though yours is a secret one. It would be understandable if you were interested in him, too. Why not be honest with your friend and tell her that you feel obsessed with this guy and you’re wondering if you have a crush on him, too! It will give her a chance to tell you that she understands or she’s mad or threatened or she wants you to go for it because she’s not having much success — whatever her response is, if you keep this obsession secret from her, your relationship with your friend won’t grow. Besides, if does feel a little jealous, she may think twice about asking you to “be her” next time around and that would be a good thing, so she can overcome her shyness and approach guys on her own. 😉

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