Yesterday, my boyfriend and I got into an arugument and he told me to leave his place, I did.
I got home and an hour later, he called me to apologize and told me he would call me later.
He called me later and told me he had been drinking and had done something he hasn’t in a really long time. He did Cocaine.
Heres a little background. 4 years ago, his previous girlfriend passwed away while she was pregnant with their baby.
When he called me, he said “I really do love you, I have loved two girls in my life, her and you. I’m just scared to love you and thats why I push you away sometimes because I’m afraid I’m going to lose you like I lost her. I think about how I treat you, and sometimes I’m so rude to you and you do everything for me. Whenever I need help, you help me, I’ve never had a girl do that for me, ever. Your amazing and I really do love you, and I don’t know why it takes me to get high to really tell you”
He’s told me sober before but not like that. Then he let me go
2 hours later I recieved a call again, this time it was an accident because it was just him and two of his friends in the background talking. For a good 10 mins it was just them talking about pretty much nothing then he brought me up and said “I wish I wasn’t such a dick to my girl. She does so much for me, and I love her so much. I just keep pushing her away because last time I loved someone they died on me. I was going to have a son and I was so ready to be a father and I lost everything. But now I found the most amazing girl, I see myself having kids with her, I’m just afraid I’m going to lose her. Sometimes when I sleep next to her, I just look at her and think she deserves better because I can’t give her everything that her family does, he dad is loaded and I’m not. But she’s my life right now. I love her”
Did he really mean this stuff? Or was it the drugs and booze talking?
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