Friends or more?

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  • #1011
    italiabella91
    Participant

    ok,I have liked this guy for a while now…I am semi good friends with him and we have talked off and on online.Well,for the past few months,I have tried saying hello and get no response.Now,he does have a busy life,but to not even say hi?come on,and he responses to his other friends..EVENTUALLY.Well,in person,he stares at me from afar for a long time,but says nothing to me and sometimes has no expression on his face.I didnt get into an argument or did anything wrong.I do not imply liking him,and I always emphasize FRIEND.Well,one of my friends is friends with him to,but she doesnt talk to him.Well,I posted something saying I was going to see him tomorrow night and she saw it and the in a relationship status(I’m not,but I cant dream can’t I?)I saw her in person and she asked me about the myspace thing and she asked me in an excited way”are you really with(his name)?”and I said no.And she said”ohhhh”and had a guilty look on her face.Like an Oops look or yikes.and I asked why?and she said “oh nothing”and said”I was gonna say,is she actually talking to him again?”and I wasnt following her.Do you think she knows something I don’t?And before,he used to talk to me off and on for months until I went away on vaca,then I asked him if he wanted anything and to let me know because I buy all my friends gifts,including new friends.And he started acting distant(he was busy) when I got back,then ignores me,but just stares now.Do you think she knows something?

    #9312
    kai
    Participant

    In my opinion, if he liked you as more than a friend he would at least respond to your “Hi” messages. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I’m a guy and I can tell you that if I liked a girl and she sent me emails saying “Hi”, I’d respond. I certainly wouldn’t ignore them.

    #9365
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    Sorry, this guy doesn’t like you. He’s giving you all the signs that he’s not really interested. You’re fantasizing that his long gazes are meaningful. They’re not. Now you’re trying to create drama based on gossip from your friend in the hopes of staying connected to him in this way. My advice to you is to forget this guy and focus your sights elsewhere. He’s got other things going on that don’t concern you. And you should do the same.

    When a guy doesn’t respond to your e-mails or instant messages or in person cues, it means he’s not interested. And even if he responds sometimes and not others, he’s not interested enough to be in any kind of relationship with you. When you start feeling him distance himself from you after you offer to buy him a gift while you’re on vacation, it’s because he doesn’t want a gift from you, and he feels that you’re misreading the relationship between the two of you to be more than it is. He doesn’t even really want to be considered good friends.

    Don’t get angry at him. He didn’t do anything wrong. He’s giving you cues so he doesn’t have to spell it out for you and hurt your feelings. That’s what the distancing is about.

    You deserve better. Next!

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