[relationshipa1]

this might be a little impossible to accomplish but i have to try somthing. i broke up with my girl friend because i was young and stupid and thought i wanted a single life. she was really torn up about it. we had a good relationship, we were close we talked about everything that could possibly be going on in a young teens life. i was 16 she was 15. puppy love probably i know. so i had broken up with her, started my single life, realized i was an idiot but by the time i had, she had rebounded to another guy and i was stuck living a life missing her. i tried another relationship, it was a good one, it was about 4 months after her and we were both maturingin our new relationships. might relationship didn’t work out. we were happy together but knew we wern’t meant to be in a relationship. we are friends now. back to my first ex, i asked for her back before i tried the other relationship, denied. i asked again after i broke up with my rebound, denied. i took her out to dinner as friends (right, so i lied.) while she was in a second rebound relationship, and we hit it off like the old days. this was a year later. she told me later that she couldnt see me like that because she still had feelings for me. this was 4 months ago, i was so torn up about it that i barely passed highschool. i am now 18, graduated from highschool while she still attends. she is single, we don’t talk. i can barely get to sleep without thinking about how much i screwed up and how much i want to move on, but even more so how much i want her back. i am truely in love i know it, everywhere i go i wish she was there with me, everytime she actually is my stomach does a backflip and i leave because i cant find the words to say. i believe the next words i say to her will matter for the rest of my life. but what do i say? how can i give myself one more chance at actually asking her to be with me for the last time. this will be the last time, if it dosnt work i’m going to move away even though i have no where to go. i can’t bare to be near her anymore without being with her. so, what do i do??

[Steve]

Boy does your post bring back memories for me…I remember going through what you are a long time ago…18 years old thinking I had missed my one chance at true love. Unfortunately, when I was your age, I didn’t have the internet and sites like this to learn from and it took a while to figure out that my dating life was really just getting started at that point…dozens of girls, one marriage, one divorce, a daughter and 18 years later, I now know what I wish I knew then…the fun is just beginning for you, my friend!

I do still remember that one girl from high school and she will always hold a special place in my heart as my “first love” and for what I learned from that relationship…in fact every one along the way is part of who I am today and regardless of the circumstances…I cherish every one of them…yes…even that one girl who tore out my heart and stomped on it 😉

Now…I hope I’m not stealing April’s thunder here, but I recommend you buy her book, “Date out Your League.” It was written just for guys like us. You can download it directly from this site. (If you’re really feeling ambitious, go out and buy/download Bob Dylan’s “Blood on the Tracks” album…you’ll learn that he’s a lot like you, just a lot better with words.)

I can guess you’re the kind of guy who’s not afraid to fall in love and in due time many women will appreciate that about you…I know it’s hard to believe right now, but you will probably fall in love many more times and soon this girl will be a distant (albeit important and fond) memory for you. The things about her that will matter for the rest of your life have already happened…your next words won’t change that one bit. Don’t forget about her…always remember what you learned from her. You and she are probably each other’s “first love” and that will never change. Now, with that in mind, move on to the rest of your life…trust me, you’ll have a blast.

[April Masini]

Your first love has made a strong impression on you. Now, it’s time to grow up a little more and realize that you’re ready for a second love. This is the only way you can move through the hurt of having lost your first love. Try and remember how lucky you are to have had such a wonderful first love at all, but like all first loves, they fade, they end, and teenagers go their separate ways and go on to love again. It’s your turn, now.

Know that you really left no stone unturned when it came to your trying to win her back. You really gave it your all, but she shot you down each time, and you have to accept that. You can also appreciate what you had, and that it’s come to an end.

Since you’ve graduated high school and she’s still in it, it’s appropriate for you to move on and date other women who’ve also graduated high school or are in college. In addition to dating, focus on making yourself something more than you are today. Women love men who are successful, so be that guy. Think about college. And if college isn’t in the cards for you, consider a great first job with a career to come.

Make a life for yourself that makes you feel good, because ultimately, that’s going to be the ultimate aphrodisiac for women, and it’s how you’ll find your next love — by starting with a strong and solid you. And don’t look back — look forward.

[Author]

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