He will not sign divorce papers but has been separated for years

[IowaKirk]

After a few months of dating, he revealed to me that his divorce hadn’t even begun. For 8 years they lived on the same property but in separated houses. Within the last 2-3 years he finally moved off the property. Apparently she had given him 3 petitions for divorce and he never responded to any of them other than texting her and saying he didn’t agree. She was the one to initiate all of this because she moved on and was living with another man, who we just found out are now pregnant. And after forgiving him I asked one of my friends who is a divorce attorney. I gave him he info and he said He would do it. I would ask about the progress and he would tell me he still had done nothing. Every time he continues to reassure me that he wants it done and he wants only me forever, even proposing. Now when I bring it up, he gets angry that I’m upset and tells me not to bring it up again. His excuses are he has no time and no extra money. Every excuse he has given me has an easy fix. Request a day off, get a free consultation, use my lawyer friend’s advice. I have found out also that in our state if they are still married when her baby is born he will have to be listed as the father in the birth certificate until paternity is established. I also found out that if he continues to NOT respond to the petitions, the she maybe be able to get a hearing and because he has not responded she has a high likelihood of being awarded what she asking. It will only hurt him and his son

[April Masini]

I don’t know what your question is — but it sounds like you just want to vent about your disappointment. 😳

I’m sorry you’re unhappy.

Your boyfriend of one year is married and doesn’t want to get divorced. 😕 You’re staying with him under these circumstances, hoping he’ll change. 🙄 So, let’s talk about you — and how to make you happy. 😉 If you want a boyfriend who is legally single and available to marry you, why not find one instead of staying with one who is married and wants to be. It’s important to know what [i]you[/i] want and what your deal breakers are in [u]any[/u] dating situation and if you don’t want to date someone who’s married, then you shouldn’t. Since he told you 2-3 months into the relationship, your option was to stay or go…. and you stayed. That was probably your basic mistake. When a guy shows you who he is, and you don’t believe him or you decide you’ll change him, you’re going to be unhappy. Now that you’re looking at him to change instead of at yourself, you’re frustrated. Turn your gaze inward, not outward. Ball’s in your court. He’s clear — you’re not. If you want to stay with him, then you have to accept that he’s going to remain married to someone else. If you want someone legally single, he’s not your guy.

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