[relationshipa1]

[i]Two years ago, I met a man online……and a year later, I fell in love with him.[/i]

Before you say “Oh, that was such a bad idea bla bla bla stalkers bla bla bla pedos bla bla…”, I know it was a bad idea. We were just friends when we met in an RPG. He was funny, sweet and kind, and we soon became best friends. Wherever he went in the game, I followed him, which is what we both wanted. He enjoyed my company, and I his. He looked forward to when I would be there, and often stayed up to [i]ungodly[/i] hours just to see me. We were in seperate time zones, which made it difficult, but he didn’t seem to notice or care. Keep in mind, he hardly knew anything about me at this point.

I was drawn to him. I don’t know when the best friend phase passed, the transition was so natural and smooth that I didn’t notice it. It seemed so easy to love him. It just felt……[i]right[/i]. One day while chatting to him, he told me that he loved me, and that is when I knew for sure that everything had just changed between us forever. I would never see him the same again, he had grown so much in my eyes. I loved him, too. So much that my heart hurt sometimes when I thought of him, like it was going to just explode out of my chest and fly around the room. I knew in my heart that he wasn’t the sort of guy to take advantage of me, or lure me into his perverted clutches. I believed in him, and I always will. And then, I met his wife. She was completely fine with my relationship with him, and actually encouraged it. His wife became my best girlfriend. He was over the moon that we could [i]be[/i] something….the only problem was, my family did not know, and I was not prepared to tell them, because I knew what they would say. They would look down on me and sneer and tell me I was sick in the head….nevertheless, my mother found out, and went online to talk to him. She came back, and said the following to me:
[i]“Rachel, he’s not a creep, he’s not a pedo, and he’s not a sicko. He’s a nice man, but your friendship with him is really wierd…..I think you should say goodbye.”
[/i]
And so I tried. I stayed away from him for six months. Not a day went by without me thinking of him, and wishing I could talk to him again. We had voice-chatted before, and I had seen pictures of him, and vice-versa. I missed his voice; his laugh, mainly. I was miserable, my mother took me to a shrink and I remember her saying;
[i]“She’s a shell of who she used to be…..ever since [u]him[/u]….I don’t know why he’s had this affect on her.”[/i]
My shrink repeated this to me later when she had left us alone. [i]“Rachel, do you know why you have been affected this way by this man?”[/i] I said nothing. I did that alot in my six months of misery.[i] “I do.”[/i] he continued. I looked at him. I really didn’t want to hear his drivel any more, so I tried to leave. [i]“Love.”[/i] he said finally. I froze. My heart stopped. This shrink was to become one of my closest friend, and he remains the only other person, besides my lover and I, that know about us. He swore not to tell my family.
That was a year ago. Since then, he and I have gotten to the point of no return…..

[i]……he is now my fiance.[/i]

I know this is wrong. He knows it, too. And yet……he can’t bring himself to walk away from me again, and I couldn’t imagine life without him. Please tell me what I should do…..my family thinks all we were was friends and I stopped talking to him almost two years ago, when, in reality, I have been keeping a huge secret from them for 22 months. Please help me, and do not tell me to leave him…..for it will be as painful as tearing my soul from my body and stomping all over it. He [b]IS[/b] my entire being now. I cannot exist in a world where he is not by my side.

[kai]

Hey Franziska,

I’ve told this to several other people who have posted questions in the WELCOME AREA: the Welcome Area [b]IS NOT for questions[/b] and [u]should not[/u] be used to get advice. 😮

it says “DO NOT post your questions” here, when you go to sign up. 😳

Please [b]repost your question in the Q & A Relationship Advice Forum[/b] if you want to get a response from April.

[b]you won’t get a response to your question here — this is the welcome area.[/b] 😀

[April Masini]

Let me know how things are going for you? 😉

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