Hi! I’m new here, and my topic isn’t a serious one, but would really REALLY like advice anyway, as I have no one else to talk to about it. thank you..
BACKGROUND: I’ve been with my fiance for 6 yrs now. When I met him, he was wild and romantic. We went to raves every week, he had a new hair color every month, he was fun and funny, sex was great and very frequent. He is eight years older than I am. I am 24, he is 32. I met him when I was 18, (he was 26). When he first nailed a great job right out of grad school, I was happy for him, but noticed a slight change in his behaviour. He started to become more of a homebody. But I know the stresses of the job, so I wasn’t at all bothered by it. I too work a high stress job, but understand how he might be effected more than I can be.
MY PROBLEM: Fast Forward- today, 1.) He never has the energy to go out and when we do, he barely even talks to his own friends! 2.) Addiction to technology, if his face isn’t glued to a TV screen, then he’s staring at his phone/computer/iPAD… and it’s always for the purpose of research and news and video games, (not porn or anything like that). 3.)All he ever wants to do is play video games. I LOVE video games, but not this much! 4.)Sex, (if I’m lucky enough to get any withing a month), is short and mediocre at best. When I put something sexy on, or try different techniques, it doesn’t seem to phase him in the least bit.
WHAT I’VE TRIED: I’ve been open with him. I’ve talked to him about each and every one of these things,(not attacking, but calmly communicating) and it always goes the same way; He fights back, we get into a whole argument, then end up apologizing to one another, vowing to be better, only to find nothing has changed. He insists that he has always been this person, when even his own good friends talk to me about how different he is. I write today because I actually woke up crying about this whole situation. I know he still loves me and that he still thinks I’m attractive because he DOES go out of his way to be with me and he always talks about me to coworkers and aquaintances. But our relationship feels more brother-sister than romantic. I’m not sure if I am in love w him anymore. All I know is that I am really missing that man I met six years ago. I’m worried, because I’m actually entertaining the thought of trying to find someone who is just like the ‘old’ him. Please help.
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