[relationshipa1]

I’ve been datng my current girlfriend for just over 14 months now, and we are happy, I mean I’m love with her – this I do not doubt. But we have had some problems in the past. My best friend has always been there for me, she has always been my shoulder to cry on, the person I talk to the most. But recently we have been dong more than just talking. we flirt, we cuddle, turn each other on, describe what we find attractive about each other. The thIng is that we both feel the same way. she has expressed an interest in me as I her. her boyfiend of 2 years recently took a year out to go o Africa and since then she has been lonely. they are maintaing a long distance relationship but it isn’t really working. I feel that she may have fallen for me accidentally as well, whilst in the process of finding emotional support in me as a friend as I did with her…. and all this is makng me feel that I may be falling for her… and I don’t know if I want to

[April Masini]

This isn’t as complex as you’re making it. 🙂

First of all, take responsibility for your part in this new relationship with your female best friend. Don’t put it all on her for falling for you. You’re doing the cuddling, the flirting and the sexy talk, too. You’ve BOTH crossed the best friend boundary and are displaying dating behavior without the dinner and the movie. So step up and take responsibility for your part in this relationship.

Second, decide if you want to date this best friend of yours or not. Now is the moment when you have to decide, because you’re very close to kissing her or making out or even having sex with her. Don’t fool yourself. If you do want to date her, then make clear to your girlfriend that you want to play the field (and be ready for her to break up with you), or else break up with your girlfriend, yourself, and pursue your best friend.

I can assure you that your girlfriend will not want to be the second wheel in a relationship with you, and the reality is that that is already happening, so it’s time for you to be clear on your behavior.

If you realize that you don’t want to lose your girlfriend, then you need to cut off from your best friend, and only socialize with her in public places with your girlfriend in tow because otherwise, you’re going to keep crossing those friend boundaries into a dating relationship. If you want your girlfriend as your one and only then behave as such. If you don’t, you’re single and free to move around the country — and date whoever you want.

I hope this helps.

[Author]

Posts