Is my girlfriend Bi ?

[wayvjay]

Hi

Hopefully you can clarify the confusion

Last weekend I was at a club with my girlfriend of 3mths , we get on great and were having a great time till I saw her check out a sexy girl on the dance floor
I asked her if she liked girls and she said “Yes”
I asked if she liked girls sexually and she said “Yes”

It felt like an arrow had shot into my chest and myt dreams were shattered

I felt like running away and got up and left and jumped into a taxi

She jumped in after me and for 24 hrs she followed me around and wouldnt leave me telling me how much she was into me

She told me she had 2 expariences with a girl when 24y (Now 40y ) and she has changed her story from “She likes girls but prefers men”

to “She is not Bi and doesnt like girls”

I really like her and she really likes me but I would hate to one day come home and she is with another girl
…If she has an itch she might oneday decide to scratch it

or go out to a club and she is checking out the girls

Maybe im old fasioned and I know what most guys would say but If you care about someone , who wants to see their partner want someone else ? boy or girl ??

She tells me she is faithful and would never cheat on me but its what goes on inside a person and it doesnt sit right with me

What should I do ?

W

[April Masini]

I think you should trust your instincts. You know yourself very well, and you want a woman who isn’t bi-sexual and has no bi-sexual past. That shouldn’t be [i]too[/i] hard to find! Dating is a process that you should take seriously! Don’t waste your time — or hers — by continuing with her when you know you have serious doubts and really want someone else. Let go of the guilt and do the right thing.

I hope that helps. Let me know how it goes and what you decide to do. And follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter, and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958[/url]. 😀

[wayvjay]

to be honest
…that hasnt helped me !

Is my birlfriend Bi ??

She now swears she isnt and she says all she wants is me !

I talked to some of my girl friends and 50% say its normal and alot !!! have had a girl exparience !
…some I never would have thaught

… they say I should talk and work things out otherwise I will never know

WHISH I JUST KNEW THE TRUTH !
..does she look at girls thinking “Awww , wish I could have some of that ! “

What happens when the relationship cools down
…as always does !

..She says it only happened twice with the encouragement of her ex boyfriend and that was 16 years ago and hasnt happened since thaugh hes did answer YES when I asked her if she liked girls and saw her checkiing a girl out … though she denys it now

hhhhhhmmmmm

Signed Confused

PS Im 40 and never found the perfect girl
…All fall short of expectation

[Sarajuana]

This is interesting to me, because I personally am very attracted to women. I sometimes feel like a sex-hungry man practically breaking my neck to check out a nice female’s behind. I have never been with a woman, besides making out with one or two, but have always wanted to try. I guess I’d consider myself “bi-curious.” With that said, I know that I prefer men and am very much in love with my boyfriend of over a year. Your post attracted me, because I was always open with him about how I thought certain women were hot, and he always seemed to be a bit insecure about it. We even got into an argument once about me spending the night at my best friends house, because she is a bit of a firecracker when she is drinking. He thought she would persuade me to have sex with her.

Honestly, I believe this is just an insecurity on your part. If you like this woman enough, then you need to learn to trust that what she is telling you is true. I think it took my boyfriend quite awhile to finally say, ‘hey, she is with me and I love her so we can go from there.’ Worrying about it is understandable, but if it’s something you think you will worry about constantly then it’s probably time to move on, and stop wasting her time and yours like April says. It’s not fair to both of you. I finally had to tell my boyfriend that I would not stop seeing my best friend, whom I’ve known much longer than him, just because he is worried about something so silly. I am an honest person, and when I tell him I will be faithful, I mean it. Hopefully your girl is honest, too, and if you have doubts then you should decide how long you want to live with those doubts.

[wayvjay]

thats sounds really bizzare to me

You say you are sex hungry and breaking your neck to check out womens behinds

And wonder why your boyfriend is jellouse ?

If you were with a guy and he really wanted to have sex with a man and when you went out
He was busy checking mens backsides out

How would you feel about that ?

You say you are being faithful but in your mind you are having unfaithfull thaughts

Would hate to be in that situation

I hope Im not

W

[April Masini]

There is no blood test or other quantitative test to determine sexuality so you have to use your instincts and your experience.

[quote]I asked her if she liked girls and she said “Yes”
I asked if she liked girls sexually and she said “Yes”
[/quote]

I think that pretty much covers what you need to know. I can’t use a mercury thermometer to determine whether or not she’s clinically bi-sexual (if there is such a determination), but based on what you saw and on what she said, I think you’re not compatible. Especially since you wrote that this doesn’t “sit right” with you.

Since you mentioned that you are 40 and have never found “the perfect girl” I’d suggest you not waste time on this one who doesn’t seem compatible with what you want. I hope that helps!

See you @AskAprilcom and on Facebook: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958[/url].

[Sarajuana]

You make it sound like it’s ok for a man to check out women, but not vice versa. Just because I love sex and I think women are attractive does not mean I can’t be faithful to one man. I am very good to him, and I believe he has worked through that jealousy. Also, I don’t check out other people when I’m with my man, and I certainly don’t act on any impulses when I’m not with him. I understand if he sees a nice looking female and maybe does a double take. If her were to approach her, talk about her constantly, or do it all the time when I’m around then we would have issues. You can’t tell me that you would not check out a nice looking female if you are away from your woman. This is a completely normal human reaction, and some people choose to cross the line(hitting on them), some don’t. Sounds like you have some serious insecurities and perhaps should date a woman that is not interested in sex at all. Maybe then you wouldn’t worry so much.

[wayvjay]

Yes I check out woman
Im a man and my girlfriend satisfys that need

But Im not checking out men and their equiptment and wanting to make out with them while dating my girlfriend

If thats the way you are, fine but would hate to be with a girl while she was thinking unfaithfull thaughts about other women
…How can I satisfy that ???

Could you handle your man wanting other men and you see him checking them out ?
Surely that would make you feel uncomfortable knowing you dont have the equiptment to satisfy him 100% ?

…If your boyfriend knows all this and OK with it then thats not a problem

Thanks for answering my message
I appreciate your comments

🙂

[April Masini]

It’s so clear from your posts that you’re really not comfortable with your current girlfriend because she’s giving you different answers and information about her sexuality. Make your life easier — and hers, too! — and find someone who is more compatible with you before you invest time you wish you hadn’t. 😉

See you @AskAprilcom on Twitter, and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958[/url].

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