Need advice on what to do

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  • #3980
    ShoeGal27
    Participant

    To make a long and complicated story a little more simple…. I’m in my early 20s and I’m originally from NJ. I met a guy at a ball game last summer and we hit it off and were initially attracted to each other. It didn’t amount to anything and I added him on Facebook. After that, we became very close. We went to the movies a few times… I moved to FL and he’s still in NJ.. he now IMs me every single day on Facebook and talks to me for hours on end. We have even started to flirt and talk dirty to one another…yet he says he doesn’t want a relationship at this point in time with anyone because he’s a local politician and has a busy career for a 20 year old as well as college.

    However, I find myself lost because it feels like we ARE in a relationship… the way we talk all the time and flirt. But he’s not committing even though I can tell he has feelings for me. We’ve started to fight a lot because I get insecure because about it… and recently he admitted when we first met a year back he thought to himself “She’s way out of my league”… I assured him I was the one who was also thinking he was out of MY league. Yet it’s like I’m stuck in a friend zone forever with him even though we have such obvious chemistry and finish each other’s sentences 24/7. It’s hard for me to be his friend without wanting more. I have tried to stop talking to him but I give in very easily and have difficulty with it. When I approach him about it he says “I just don’t rush things.. it’s not that I’m rejecting you” but it’s been over a year! And he seems openly interested in sexual exchanges (though we’ve never done it) with me so I’m completely confused.

    Need help on how to handle this?

    #17560
    Angelbaby7
    Participant

    You need to stop talking to him. If he really liked you he would’ve made you his girlfriend. He wants you around because you’re good for his ego. You have made it abvious that you like him alot and you’re ready to be his gf. I’m sorry it’s not going to work because he doesn’t know your worth. Please do not have sex with him as he’s only going to use you. End it now or you’re going to get hurt. Make sure you tell him why you want to end it. If he realizes your worth, he’ll come back and he’ll give you the commitment you want. Otherwise you don’t need him. There are plenty of men out there that are dying to date you and make you theirs so don’t waste your time on someone that doesn’t really care about you.

    #19201
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    [b]Angelbaby7 [/b]is right.

    This guy has feelings for you, that’s for sure — but they’re not in his heart. They’re in a different part of his body, south of the four chambers! 😕 If a man tells you he doesn’t want a relationship and he acts like he just wants to string you along for sex, you’d be wise to pay attention.

    Women just like you get suckered into these long distance sex-only relationships all the time, and I’ve always said that sex is different for men and women. Sex changes things for women. Even talking dirty changes things for them. But men have sex because they can. Trust me — this guy is seeing way more women than you know or care to admit to yourself. You only went to the movies with him a couple of times — don’t waste any more of your life. This isn’t Mr. Right, andy you’re going to end up hurt. Read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]http://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], and wise up! You’ll thank me.

    Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter. 😀

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