[relationshipa1]

So im looking for some advice about my current realationship we have been dateing for around seven months now and we really only see eachother 1 maybe 2 times a week she always seems to have something else to do with her friends instead of seeing me im starting to feel like im just second best to everyone else we are both in our mid twentys and im really ready to settle down now with someone but im very unsure if she feels the same way she says she does but im not really seeing any progreshion in us we seem to be stuck at the same pointe as we were when we first got together she travels abit and we say i will go and see her and everytime im getting ready to leave there is some reason for me not to go she has been hanging out with some guy friends recently to witch i just found out about i dont think she would cheat but i really am starting to question i just really dont know what to do or where i stand 🙁

[April Masini]

Trust your instincts. If you’re ready to settle down, and your girlfriend of seven months seems to always find something else to do rather than see you, and you feel like the relationship isn’t progressing, you’re probably right. Actions speak louder than words, so that regardless of what she says, she’s not spending time with you or making you a priority in a way that makes you feel like your best self.

My guess is that the guy friends she’s hanging out with may contain one or two guys she’s interested in romantically, and while she isn’t officially cheating, she’s probably enjoying these guys’ company. If she was totally committed to you, she’d make you her priority and make time for you more than once a week.

I don’t think she’s the one for you to marry. Check out my book, Date Out of Your League, by clicking on the Dating Advice Books link at the top of the page, and scroll down until you see the book. It’s not expensive, and you can read it pretty quickly. It will give you a lot of good advice, tips and hints on how to find a woman who is Ms. Right for you.

[Anonymous]

but if she wasnt into me any more would she still say she loves me is there anyway to try and turn things around i mean does this sound like a normal relationship when we are together she is very affectionat towards me i just am not sure if im wanting to much to soon as far as the guy friends it is my understanding that its not just her and them more of a mixed group that just bothers me because i feel that she should tell me if she is hanging out with other men maybe im wrong on that one im really not sure what to do at all

[April Masini]

If your girlfriend is hanging out with a group of friends and there happen to be other men in the group, then you may be overreacting. I can’t say that she should be reporting in to you whenever she hangs out with a group of friends and there happen to be men in the group of friends.

It sounds like the bigger problem is that you’re not getting enough attention from her. If that’s the case, then consider wooing her more. I know that’s an old fashioned term, but the reality is that women love to be attended to and made to feel special. Maybe you’re waiting for her to make you feel more like a boyfriend, but the solution is that you need to make her feel like more of your girlfriend.

Roses or flowers are a great way to make a woman feel like she’s special. Jewelry is a wonderful girlfriend gift to give. Other than that, love notes, meaningful gestures and adventures that you take her on like hiking, a road trip, or something else that’s special and fun. Maybe you should amp up the dates you’re taking her on and make them more romantic. In addition, you can initiate get-togethers with her group of friends and some of your own, too.

Consider that it’s possible that she’s feeling stuck in a rut in the relationship, too. Until one of you makes a move to dial up the romance, you’ll stay put. And that’s not where you want to be.

[bigmoney11]

[size=150]WELL I MET THIS REALLY NICE GUY ABOUT 4 MONTHS AGO. HE HAS NOT SEEN ME YET BUT HE HAD AGREED TO WAIT UNTIL I COULD GET PICTURES MADE. SO THE PROBLEM IS. I HAVE ASKED HIM A FEW TIMES TO CALL ME BUT HE HAS NOT DONE SO AS OF YET. MY COMPUTER BROKE DOWN A WEEK AGO I WAS HIGHLY UPSET BECAUSE I DO EVERYTHING ON MY COMPUTER. SO I HAD TOLD HIM ABOUT THAT IN A E-MAIL HE SAID NOTHING TO THE FACT, I TOLD HIM I WAS SICK BECAUSE MY COMPUTER WAS BROKE. I ASKED HIM TO CALL ME HE SAID SEND ME YOUR NUMBER AND SO I DID HE STILL HAD NOT CALLED ME. SO EVEN THROUGH THINGS WERE GOOD BETWEEN US I OFTEN WONDERED WHY HE WONT CALL ME. NO HE’S NOT MARRIED. BUT I WENT TO THE SITE WHERE WE FIRST MET AND I SAW THAT HE HAD BEEN GOING THERE FOR 3 WEEKS. BUT EVEN THROUGH HE WAS GOING THERE HE HAD A FEW WEEKS BEFORE ALL THIS HAPPENED HE HAD TOLD ME HOW MUCH HE CARE FOR ME AND WE ARE ALWAYS MAKING PLANS FOR HIS RETURN TO FLORIDA IN DECEMBER. WE TALK ABOUT 2 TIMES A WEEK. SO WHEN I FOUND OUT HE WAS BACK ON THE SITE I WENT COMPLETELY OFF. NOT GIVING MYSELF TIME TO THINK THAT ITS PROBABLY NOTHING, SINCE HE HASN’T CHANGED ON ME. BUT I ASKED FOR, FORGIVENESS AND I ALSO MENTIONED THAT HE SHOULD SHARE SOME OF THE BLAME. BECAUSE IF HE HAD OF CALLED ME I WOULD OF BEEN OK. ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS FEEL BETTER BECAUSE COMPUTER WAS BROKE. I FEEL LIKE TJHIS HE’S A CHRISTIAN MAN WHO TOLD ME THAT HE LIKES ME ALOT. SO BY GODS GRACE WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET THROUGH THIS. YOUR RESPONSE WOULD BE NICE. THAK YOU. [/size]

[April Masini]

I’m happy to help you, but next time, start a new post instead of piggybacking onto someone else’s post. It’s easier for others to chime in and help you that way!

As for your question, I’m not sure why you asked forgiveness from a guy you met online, who never called you. Neither one of of you did anything wrong. Sometimes guys don’t call. It’s not a crime. Especially for one you really didn’t know very well. In fact, it seems like you’re creating drama from nothing. So, relax — there is no relationship to “get through.” You didn’t really have a relationship — he’s just someone you met online but never got together with in real life.

When it comes to dating, meeting online can be terrific. But it’s a good idea not to put all your eggs in one basket until you’ve invested some real “face time” together. It’s okay to keep your dating profile up online if you’re not dating anyone in person, and it’s okay to talk to other people online if you’re not dating anyone in person. In fact, you should expect that behavior from men, and they should from you, too. Who wants to waste their time with someone who may not be right for them? Not you!

Although he may have told you he likes you while you were both online, and he said he made plans to visit you after you put your photos online, so he could see what you looked like before he agreed to meet you face to face, that’s just the beginning of a [i]possible[/i] relationship. It doesn’t necessarily mean he likes you enough to see you or date you, and it certainly doesn’t mean you have a real life relationship or that once he sees your photos he’s still going to want to meet you at all. Don’t take this personally. It’s pretty normal behavior for most people. Hopefully you’ll understand this so you don’t get hurt again if you meet a man online who says he likes you, but doesn’t call or ask you on a date. People say lots of things, but it’s much easier to judge them by their actions.

The other thing to remember about meeting people online, or meeting people that your friends and family and co-workers don’t know, is that just because they say something, doesn’t mean it’s true. Just because he says he likes you, what he means is that he likes you [i]so far[/i]. It doesn’t mean he’d rush to your side if you were in a car accident or that he’s going to make you his Valentine’s date. And vice versa — same for you with him. Don’t pretend a relationship is further along than it is just because you want it to be. Getting to know someone can save you a lot of time. For instance, this guy isn’t Mr. Right for you, and luckily, you didn’t waste six months on him.

Playing the numbers game in dating is a very good idea. You should get my book, Think & Date Like A Man, so you can understand more about dating, and getting what you want, and meeting who you want to meet. You can click on the Dating Advice Books link at the top of the page, and scroll down to Think & Date Like A Man and order it there for only $15.95. Among other things it will help you understand that in dating, it’s important to keep putting yourself up to bat, and being willing to strike out because you know that one of these times at the plate, you’re going to hit a home run and meet Mr. Right. This guy didn’t work out. Okay. Next!

Rejection can be a gift because it saves you time. If a man isn’t interested in you enough to call you, then why would you waste your time with him? You should be the prize in the relationship that he’s wanting to chase down and win. If you throw yourself at him by giving him your phone number before he asks for it, tell him to call you, then get upset when he doesn’t — and ask forgiveness from him for getting upset — you’ve lost your “prize” status, and there’s nothing for him to chase, and certainly no romantic relationship at hand. So accept the rejection for the gift of clarity that it is, and move on to find someone who wants you because he thinks you’re incredible.

Get back out there, with what you’ve learned, and be the woman who gets the guy. (My book will help you with this like a good friend who gives you solid advice.)

[bigmoney11]

we don’t live in the same states plan to meet in December.

[bigmoney11]

But God showed me this person in my dreams 3 times. and nothing was bad.God gives me visions in my dreams I see things before it happens. been like this for years.

[April Masini]

I can’t help you with religious issues. It’s not my area of expertise. You should consult with a minister of whatever religion you belong to for advice on god.

I can, however, help you with human relationships, and I’m always happy to do so!

[bigmoney11]

so you don’t believe in God? the creater of the universe? all this is human issues. if you don.t believe in God how do you think mankind came in to play?

[April Masini]

This isn’t really about me. I’m trying to get [i]you[/i] the help [i]you[/i] need to answer your questions, and the best help will come from people who know what they can and can’t speak with [i]expertise[/i] about.

I’m happy to give you my professional opinion about human relationships, but anything that has to do with god and religion or creation is really best addressed by experts in those fields.

I wish you all the luck!

[wacki 0335]

Hello Bigmoney11,
I think you should read very closely what April is saying and take her advice. April didn’t write that she didn’t believe in God. She said she wasn’t an expert in that area.

How do you know your dreams are from God? They could be your mind wanting something it can’t have. The guy doesn’t call!!! That is your sign right there! Buy April’s book. I did and it covers everything you need to know.

[bigmoney11]

so since this guy was misleading for whatever his reasons were. how do I prepare myself for a good clean healthy relationship? first a guy back home got in touch with my children and wanted me to call him. so i did but he went through a lot of trouble for nothing. and then this one. i don’t know why my patterns are the same. i don’t know if it’s because i talk to much, tell to much invent a dream life to much. i just don’t know what to do. ok where should i start first. i am not getting any younger i just want a good relationship. help me.

[bigmoney11]

where you i start. it seems like i’ve been like this most of my life always looking for a man. always wanting to create this fairy tale of a life. everytime i think a guy likes me. i guess i get carried away. thinking that he likes me as much as i like him, but it always turns out bad. i have never met a decent guy that would love me for me. i think he likes me then i get all these happy feelings. just to be let down. i don’t know why i am like this, but it maybe to late for change. i have lived all of my life in misery. i was married up until last year, had to get rid of that drunk. but iam in college now. graduating next year. how could i change if i have been like this all my life. no one wants me to be who i am, they want to send you through changes. i had my phone number changed today. because i dont want anyone calling me. i never told anyone about this guy because knowing me things would not work out. you selling this book that may not help me. so i should just get a boat load of guys and keep them as friends? how can i make myself happy. i have to do everything by myself. evryone else they have people to do things with. i am in a state where i dont know anyone. i am so fed up trying to find someone to enjoy life with. i talk to much but not to every guy. i just dont know what to do, sometimes it’s hard to tell what i will do next. i don’t know how to meet descent guys. life rea;;y makes me sick. i really hate men.

[bigmoney11]

so if a guy talks to you for 5 months you would think something is going on.conversations are good, well i will try not to just put all my interest into one man, but i dont usually be in a place to meet other guys. tell everything i need to do untill i am able to buy your book, i really need some real advice. thank you

i wonder why he strung me alone for so long? why didnt he tell me we could be just friends, do guys be scared to tell us the truth? i will try hard to think and date like a man. then that way i am sure not to feel this way. every time i think i will play my cards right then comes these feelings from out of no where. so i have to be on the defense not letting anyone get close.and work on myself not get close to soon if it means walking away.

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