Same-sex relationship…great relationship, but where to go?

[Pangea]

I have a great relationship with another woman. She’s kind, caring, beautiful, and she completes me. We’re very much in love (we call each other daily when we’re apart). The only problem is, we’re both thinking about “forever” together, and I’m not sure how to make “forever” work.

Firstoff, she’s my roommate (we’re both mid-late 20s). We were mutually attracted from the start, but I held back my feelings until I couldn’t do it any longer and finally told her that I loved her. That started a relationship that has lasted for the past four months. Yes, I did get the “I love you return,” and we’ve tried not to rush into things. Neither one of us has had a real relationship before. She dated a few guys briefly. I had always been single. So, we explored our feelings and the physical manifestations of our love as two newcomers, excited to watch things progress between us. We have expressed our love physically, although we generally keep ourselves fully clothed for this expression.

Okay, so basically, I have a great relationship with another bisexual. I have some concerns about coming out to my conservative family, and she’s shy about coming out, too. I’ve spent my whole life looking for a special girl, and I think I finally found her. Some is timing, since I finally felt ready for a relationship while knowing her. I’m unsure whether my family would approve of this relationship–they think I’m heterosexual–I never gave any strong indications one way or another about my sexuality. I love her more than anything else in the world, and I want to marry her. After 4 months of a relationship is proposing jumping the gun?

Would it be a folly to ask her to marry my after just a few months of being together? We’ve known each other for 2 years now, and I’m so much of a better person with her. Given my family situation and that we can’t get married where we live/plan to live, would it be silly to even talk of marriage? I love her, and I don’t want to lose her. I need some advice so that I do the right thing for both of us. Thanks!

[April Masini]

First of all, YES, it is [i]WAY [/i]too soon to propose marriage to someone after four months of dating. Wait a year.

Second, I know you don’t want to lose her, but it’s unclear that you’re in danger of losing her. I’m not sure what you’re afraid of. It seems that mostly you’re excited that things are going well and you don’t quite know where to put that excitement. Relationships become long term, one day at a time.

Coming out to your families are personal decisions that have to do with the kind of relationships you’ve had with your families, have with your families and want to have with your families. It’s a process and requires flexibility and understanding.

I hope this helps. Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958[/url]. 😀

[Pangea]

Thanks, April. I needed that reality check.

[April Masini]

No problem — glad to help!

If you get a moment, would you do me a favor and write a review of this site for me at this link: [url]http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&cp=27&gs_id=2y&xhr=t&q=naples+relationship+experts&qe=bmFwbGVzLCByZWxhdGlvbnNoaXAgZXhwZXJ0&qesig=5ePSxsE58_ATGEuiBgQXBQ&pkc=AFgZ2tmr1hK_bEnl96XNDnJhv9fPLrTKomuzIeMJVjHRz9Sh9HZMoY9APtQAsdBc0TSgnT-Q2gdku4yZ5fY88T1qCyX7FqZCkg&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&biw=988&bih=536&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wl[/url]. Just scroll down and click onto the second page of experts, where you’ll find me! Click on my link and write me a quick review.

THANKS!! 😀

[Author]

Posts