Dating is that it’s a process that lets you learn about yourself and the other person, and then to use what you learn to make decisions. You’re 48 and you’ve been dating your 29 year old girlfriend for three months. You felt uncertain about her commitment to you, so you snuck into her phone, and learned that she meets up with guys from online websites and apps. Now that you have that information, you have choices. 😉 You can choose to play the field, or break up because you want someone who is willing to commit more fully at the three month mark, or continue seeing her knowing that she’s looking around at other options.
I always suggest using this dating model: Use the first 3 months to decide if you want to continue dating someone — that’s where you are now. If you chose to do so, then use the next three months to decide if you want to be monogamous. I know this feels like a very slow time table, but it will help you avoid making commitments to someone you don’t know that well, too soon. Your situation is exactly why this timetable is a good idea. 😉 It forces you not to jump into things prematurely. You can’t tell her not to date other men after only three months, but you can learn that someone you want a commitment to, and with whom you’ve been very generous with your heart, your time, and your money — doesn’t feel the same way you do right now. You get to make choices using that information. I hope that helps.
.
