Dear April,
I have recently moved in to university – I have been here no longer than 10 days. In my residence hall, there are several people and quite a few kitchens. I happen to be sharing the same kitchen with this girl, absolutely beautiful, and I am quite infatuated already. I am a shy person, and we don’t speak often. We do quite often share a soulful stare into each other eyes, which then breaks away, often, with no word being said. She usually does the talking (however little it might be) and calls me Matt, short for Mathew, even though no one else does (and I never asked her to, either).
When we go out to campus parties we don’t dance together, or even interact in any manner. I try to avoid her, as I get ‘intimidated’ by her presence. She is very outgoing and it is not as if she pursues me in any way. She does give me the look often, though, and if I happen to see her when I’m far from the group of friends at the club I see her looking at me often. The other day I made out with a random girl (I was drunk) who was relatively close to her – which she doesn’t know – and, as I did so, I just happened to see her whisper something to her friend and they left the area.
In all sincerity and humility, I have noticed that the other girls in my residence hall are quite keen on me. I have always been very successful with the ladies and am known to be quite a good-looking guy. I also play the guitar and she said a friend of hers told her I play really well, so a conversation about me did occur at some moment in time. She is charming and delightful, but I might as well tell you now that I won’t be asking her on a date of any sorts, or anything which would directly indicate a desire for a romantic relationship. The reason for this is that I’m very shy, and I couldn’t bare being openly rejected by someone who I see everyday. I’m very analytical and I tend to only go ahead with something if I am sure I have a very big chance of success.
My question to you, April, is if you think I should trust my instinct, which tells me that she at least fancies me? I am not suggesting that she might like me (as boyfriend material), or even as much as I do her, but do you think this is all in my head, or is there a chance of something real going on here? The last time I found myself in this instinct situation, with another beautiful girl, I spent an entire week (on a cruise, with her, and other people) thinking she might like me, but, too shy to do something, I didn’t. The girl on the cruise was, however, a bit more direct than the girl I am infatuated with now. At the end her friend told me she wanted to make out with me all week long, and that I had missed my chance (as she lives very far from where I do).
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