What is he waiting for????

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  • #4785
    swmich
    Participant

    My bf of 4 mos. is over all but one day a week. I don’t know why he doesn’t just move in. When I asked him when he was planning on moving in he only says he doesn’t know. I don’t want to bring it up again, I am waiting for him. I want him to move in when he is ready and feel like I am rushing him. But I am getting impatient! Why won’t he discuss this? What is he waiting for??? Help Please!!!

    #21608
    someoneinaustx
    Participant

    Because he is still waiting to be sure that the relationship is as solid as he wants it to be before making that decision. In my opinion, people should date at least a year before moving in with one another. Especially if part of the decision as to why he should move in is financial (i.e. saves you money).

    I would not push the issue, or you will push him away (this from a male)…

    I refused to move in with any girlfriend when I was younger, even though I spent a lot of time at my girlfriends’ places. I didn’t want to play house, I wanted to sleep in my own bed with my own things from time-to-time, and it was good for us all to take breaks from time to time without feeling smothered…

    I tell this to all women… and I don’t know you or your situation, so don’t be offended if it doesn’t apply to you, but if you are having a lot of sex, back off of it and spend time with each other outside of the bedroom for a while. When you do have sex, make it spectacular, but back off of the frequency until you are certain that he is in it for you and not the sex. Many women are surprised at the answer: when the sex slows, he goes.

    #21618
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    I like the answer [b]someoneinaustx[/b] gave you!

    Four months is way too soon for anyone to be moving in with anyone. YOU don’t know him well enough to want him to move in with you and he has the good sense to know it’s too soon. Learn more about who he is, who you are, and what you want so that you can make smart relationship decisions. 😉

    Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1154528031[/url].

    #21687
    swmich
    Participant

    As of Jan 2 it has now been 6 mos. I know that its not about sex. A lot of times we don’t. I know he is just being cautious. And that is best. Thanks for the advice. 🙂

    #21755
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    You’re welcome! 😀

    Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1154528031[/url].

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