which guy?

[relationshipa1]

Im in a predicament that I know I can only solve, but I need advice. And fast.
heres the very brief overview. My boyfriend and I discussed an open relationship where we were both allowed to kiss other people. I, then, kissed a boy who is the polar opposite of my boyfriend. My boyfriend got angry, broke up the man I kissed and his girlfriend (he was in a soon to end relationship). Now, my boyfriend wants to make things better and vows to make changes to be a better person. The new boy is saying he wants to be in a relationship with me and only me. Now I have two choices. Stay with my long time boyfriend, or go for a new thing.
Here are my pros and cons. I want to stay with my long term boyfriend because I love him. I think we have a future together, and I want to date through college with him, so (as harsh as this sounds) I always have him, and can take some on the side as well. The other boy though is new and exciting, but the physical attraction has warn off, but I also caused the break up of his relationship. My current boyfriend is sweet and wonderful and I see a future of pure comfort and happiness. But I want to explore, which the other guy can provide the fun factor that a long relationship leaves limp. And the other guy is less good looking, but more macho and sporty, willing to do things. But sometimes just cuddling on the couch with a few kisses is all I want.
…this was a rant. But any advice?

[April Masini]

Open relationships don’t work. 😳 You can see the havoc it wreaked in yours. I’m not sure who’s idea it was, but even just kissing outside of your relationship is enough to send another guy — or even you if you care enough about your guy to feel protective and jealous — into crazy space.

But that said, I don’t think your relationship with your boyfriend is going to work long term because you clearly want to experiment with other guys, but you are too fearful of losing him to be honest with him. This lack of honesty is eventually going to catch up with you.

My advice is to decide that your desire to experiment is greater than your desire to be honest with your boyfriend, and to accept that the break up will be sad because you have feelings for him, but that if you stay together, you won’t be taking care of yourself by being authentic and following your heart.

I hope this helps. Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url]http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001113133958[/url].

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