People lie because they don’t want you to know what they’re doing because if you did, it would upset the status quo. Trust your instincts, your wife of 23 years isn’t being honest with you because she doesn’t want you to know what she’s doing because if you did, it would change the relationship. You don’t need her to prove this to you — you already know it. The question for you is, what’s going on in the marriage that is cause for her to look outside of it. These things don’t happen in a vacuum, and it’s easy to point fingers. It’s more difficult to look at the marriage and try to figure out why this is happening. I can only guess — but you have to ask yourself if the romance has faded, your sex life has waned, if she’s upset about something personal and is acting out with these other men — if you want the marriage to work better, then you have to work on it.
You can start by talking to her about what’s going on with her — but try not to blame her or point fingers. I know you’re upset, but if you put her on the defense, she’s going to come out swinging, or retreat — neither one of these is going to progress the marriage. Instead, start by telling her your feelings about her and what you want — if how much you value you her and why. This sets the tone for one of cooperation. When you talk about the blocked calls express sadness and disappointment, not anger and blame — if you want to work with her, instead of against her. 😉 I hope that helps.
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