I feel you on this one. I’ve been married for 12 years and it still goes on but the difference is that he does do it for control and to “put me in check”. When I get mad he does the same thing, says he was joking, in what world was it funny who knows. It really is an easy decision but can become a difficult one. I don’t want to tell you what you should do or need to do, or what will end up happening, after all it is your choice. It will most likely not get better without probably some professional help and he really does need a life outside of you. For me it has affected my marriage and my life. Teasing when it hurts someone else is not respect in any form, especially if he knows that it hurts your feelings. He is doing it on purpose for some kind self gratification. As for thinking for the long run, if he has leverage to hurt your feelings now then he is going to have a lot to come. There really are two options: One toughen up. My dad always tols me when I got upset that no one can make you feel a way that you don’t want to feel. (I’m not saying this is your fault) If you feel bad about something you haven’t come to terms with what you have done and it is not right that he plays on that. So you can toughen up, which I recommend to an extent but you don’t want to become bitter and heartless. That is no way to live. It will end up causing a lot of problems in your relationship later and think if you had kids, is this how he is going to treat them too, why wouldn’t he if he does it to you. Two is call is quits before it does go any farther. Now it will be difficult but could save you a lot more heartache later when you are a mess form years of living with that. There are people out there that will show compasion to you and everyone deserves compasion. Plus insecurity in either party is unattractive and the other one can only stand that for so long before they look at the other person with disgust. You are there to be his partner in crime not his mother to hold his hand. He sounds like he does have issues that need to be worked out and it is your choice if you are going to be there to help him in that challenge or not. He needs to be made to feel secure and no matter what you do you may never be able to give him that, that is a lot of pressure on you. Are you up to the challenge? Best wishes and luck.
