Wow I was not expecting that answer at all! It’s definately a reality check. I do have to admit I have changed a lot since he moved out (2 months ago). The reason why I would always verbally abuse him is because (not that it makes it ok) my father always abused my mother (verbally and physically) and she never said anything. Back then I looked at this as weakness but now I see how strong she was to be the bigger person. Subcounciously I didnt want to be a “victim”.
It just hurts that we were still being intimate and he was doing this behind my back all while lying to me when I asked him. He would drop hints like saying “I’m not having sex with anyone” “I stay home all day ” when in reality I also found it he was going out all over the place while I’m working, taking care of our daughter by myself 95% of the time, and going to school.
I also have a lot of pent up anger from our past (he’s cheated on me before) so I’m just confused. I know I have done a lot to hurt our relationship but I just think it’s wrong of him to have told me and given me false hopes saying that this break was for us to be in a better relationship and for the sake of our family. Specially since we have been together almost 7 years together and I have done a lot for him as well. For the majority part of our relationship I have been the “bread winner” and the only person he could rely on. Also how can you tell someone you love them and they are your soul mate but have sex with someone else? I just don’t get it. But thank you for the advice.
