[wacki 0335]

Great advice again!! I didn’t think of any of that except for calling the cops. I have to work with the guy and didn’t want to have any drama at work so I didn’t call the cops. That would have gone around work like a wild fire. Calling a cab and not after dark is brilliant. I also thought about calling a female friend or family member after the fact when I tried to figure out what I could have done differently.

Thanks!!

[wacki 0335]

If they have been my friend for a long time the transition from friends to boyfriend would be weird, but it does happen sometimes. If I just meet them and I put them in the friend category it is because I don’t see a relationship with them, but like them as a person. Otherwise, I would just stop seeing them altogether.

To answer the question ” does the friend zone exist?” I would have to say from my personal experience I have used it because it was true and I have used it to not hurt a friends feelings because I was not physically attracted to them but enjoyed their company. I am sorry. I know that doesn’t really help you to distinguish between the two.

[wacki 0335]

Thanks for your input. The friendship with this guy is definitely over in my book. He tried to take advantage of me and the situation knowing I wouldn’t put a friend out to drink and drive. I still have to work with him, but I can keep it professional. I guess I need to go back to the advice that I give to my daughters of never put yourself into a situation where you are alone with a guy. But, again I did believe we were friends and had made it clear to him on several occasions that we were only friends. I left NO room for hope of anything more. He knows that I like a guy that lives in another town. We were actually talking about the guy and he was asking me if he treated me right. It was totally out of nowhere that he exposed himself.

I know that husbands/wives and boyfriends/girlfriends can be and should be friends. I meant can males/females have a friendship as only friends?

[wacki 0335]

Thanks April!! Your advice is always right on. Sometimes is it hard to see what is right in front of your face ecspecially if it isn’t what you want to see. I will definitely take your advice and be quiet and see what happens. I am afraid I know what will happen and so be it.

I am going to go out and buy your book. I think it will be money well spent and from what I have read of your responses to people, you really know your stuff.

Thanks again!

[wacki 0335]

I believe if he is a young healthy heterosexual male sex is important! The best thing to do is ask him what the problem is.

[wacki 0335]

Hey JJVC,
I will try not to be judgmental of you, but most people will be. I am sure it was comforting to have your cake and eat it too, but the truth is more comforting than betrayal. What is done is done and it is time to let her go have a real relationship and for you to be the best to your family that you can be and that means being honest to your wife and children. Being there 100% for them and not divided between your two lives.

April is right (of course) a clean break is needed. Have a face to face talk and then no more contact. That just leaves the door open and makes things so much harder to end. Closing the door and locking it is the best way to do it, hard but the best.

You may also want to try to figure out what is lacking in your marriage or yourself that made you cheat in the first place. Try to fill that void and make your marriage better. The girl is younger than you. Are you having a mid-life crisis? You will both be better off if she is with someone her age that she can have a true relationship with and you will be a better husband/father. Time to do the right thing and be proud of yourself!!!

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