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Met my first love after 10 years.. She is divorced and i am married to someone else

Hello april,
I am sarath,i am from india.i am 27 years old and i am married to my love..we met during our college days..we loved for 8 years before getting married.. Before that i was in love with a girl.. During my school days..i lost contact with her after school,i tried to contact her during my college days but nothing worked out.. Recently i met her in Facebook..she is divorced and is staying in the same city..we chatted through WhatsApp and i met her last week,.we had we are seeing each other on a weekly basis..i am not in love with her..but i am totally disturbed nowadays..i feel like i am not loving my wife like i loved her before..i feel like my life would have been so different if i Married my first love..i feel like i would have been more happy if I married my first love, can u give me some tr anything wrong in meeting her..i just want my first love in my life like my other Friends...i feel happy, confident and positive when i am with her..what should i do..please give me a reply

Re: Met my first love after 10 years.. She is divorced and i am married to someone else

You're in a long term marriage that's feeling a little stale, and you've contacted your first love who is divorced. Now you're fantasizing about what life would be like if you were with her -- and not your wife. Lots of people have this type of fantasy and curiosity. Marriage takes work if you want to sustain it, and there are all kinds of temptations. What you have to do is decide if you want to stay in your marriage or not. If you do, then you need to work at it. If you don't, then you should get out of it before you start dating anyone else. It's not fair to any future girlfriend, your wife or yourself if you create drama by dating during marriage because you want out. Just walk through the exit door, get divorced and then date -- if that's what you want.

As for your ex, she's not a friend and if you see her without your wife, it's going to be a lot more like dating than like friendship, so make sure you're clear on that. Your feelings towards her are not friendly. They're romantic. So, make a decision about your marriage -- in or out -- and then if you stay in it, and want to connect with your ex, invite her out with your wife, to minimize the potential drama.

I hope that helps.
April Masini is a relationship and etiquette expert, author of 4 books and the #1 relationship advice forum, blue-chip corporate spokesperson and preferred go-to source for the world’s most prominent media and news outlets.