Here is an update:
We have been together almost 8 months.
On Febuary 4th, my boyfriend and I broke up. He dumped me indirectly. Some of his actions made me believe he wasn't sure about me. He asked me if I was to end it. I said, "No, but I can't continue the relationship with someone who is unsure about me." He said that he gets frustrated with me so easily and he doesn't feel a strong connection with me like he used to and more and more he finds himself becoming a mean and upset person when he is around me. He said I am "super sweet but we are just not a healthy fit." After that, I unfriended him on Facebook, but he still has the pics of us together on Facebook that I'm tagged in.
The break up was over text. I was just too upset to call him.
I have been using the No Contact method. What can I do to get him to miss me and try again? What can I do to make myself more appealing so he regrets his decision, and falls in love with me all over again? I just feel we need a break from eachother instead of him giving up on me completely. I want him to initiate contact, not me. In the meantime, I have been working on myself. I am going to get into shape. The problem manifested because of my poor social skills. I am going to see a therapist to figure out what I am doing wrong. I want him to see I have changed and give me another chance. I don't want to find someone else.
Based on the information I gave you, what can I do, so that would make him miss me and give the relationship another try. I know this relationship is salvagable. The fact that I am Facebook friends with five of his friends, he is able to get updates about me. Can you give me tips what to post on my Facebook?
Re: We broke up and I want him back
#2I went back and read your previous posts -- I think it's great that you're looking at the reasons why he broke up with you and are coming up with things you can do to improve your own situation. You talked about poor social skills -- and this is definitely something you can work on. The way to do this is to get out there and interact on different levels, socially. Make new friends. Reconnect with old friends. And play the field by dating. Hone in on what is uncomfortable and where you think your social skills need work. I think it's great you're working out and focusing on your health and fitness -- that's always a plus. No ever regrets that area of improvement! So be proud -- you're doing great. I know this is hard and it hurts... but there is no short cut. You're doing the hard work. Keep going.
Lastly, having no contact is definitely a way to give him an opportunity to miss you and since it's only been since February 4th that you've really broken up, you're going to have to use discipline to not contact him and to stay away from social media. No contact really means NO CONTACT. So get busy working on your social skills and your health goals. Join gyms, take classes and do things that are fun and feel good. The healthier you are, the more he is going to notice the difference and see you for someone he's having second thoughts about having broken up with.
Lastly, having no contact is definitely a way to give him an opportunity to miss you and since it's only been since February 4th that you've really broken up, you're going to have to use discipline to not contact him and to stay away from social media. No contact really means NO CONTACT. So get busy working on your social skills and your health goals. Join gyms, take classes and do things that are fun and feel good. The healthier you are, the more he is going to notice the difference and see you for someone he's having second thoughts about having broken up with.
April Masini is a relationship and etiquette expert, author of 4 books and the #1 relationship advice forum, blue-chip corporate spokesperson and preferred go-to source for the world’s most prominent media and news outlets.