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[Standard] This is really making my mind go crazy

#1
Are you male or female:
Male

Is the person your question is about male or female:
Female

What is your age:
32

What are the ages of the other people involved:
26

What is your relationship status:
Single

What is the relationship status of the person you are dating:
Single

How long have the two of you been together:
6 weeks

Is this an online only relationship:
No

Have you ever had a date in person, face-to-face:
Yes

If this is a long distance relationship, how often do you physically see each other:
30 minutes apart. approx twice a week we get together

If you’re engaged, when is the wedding date:
Does not apply

If you’re engaged, but there is no wedding date set — why not:
Does not apply

Are you divorced or just separated:
Does not apply

How long have you been divorced:
Does not apply

How long has the person you are dating been divorced:
Does not apply

How many kids do you each have, and how old are they:
Does not apply

What country do you live in:
USA

Describe any cultural, religious or family influences impacting your relationship:
Does not apply

I have been dating a girl for about 6 weeks. Feels like everything is going great. But i notice a few times a week she will completely disappear/drop off the earth all day long then around 8pm text/call me like she is really happy to end her day talking to me . Like one day last week we chatted briefly in the morning...said good morning and such. I knew she had to help someone so i asked how it was going a and she didnt respond until 8 pm almost 12 hours later and didnt miss a beat about how happy she was to talk to me? This happens once or twice a week and i dont know why. But when we talk or when were together everything is great. What should i do? Should i bring it up or let it ride out to see what happens? I dont want to come across as suddenly creepy but we have already decided to officially be bf/gf and it bothers me she disappears like this. I notice when we are together though her phone is always within an arms reach which is also why this bothers me. We dont talk alot during the day normally because we both work but she works works from home and then goes out to meet clients so its not like she has a job that she isnt allowed to touch her phone. What bothers me most is when the conversation just drops at one of my comments/questions or if i send a "hows your day going" text and dont get a reply for 12 hours. We have such a great thing when were together but then this completely drop of the earth thing is weirding me out more than anything ive ever run into dating. Sorry if this is kind of jumbled i am typing it out as i chew it over in my head.

Re: [Standard] This is really making my mind go crazy

#2
Don't make a mountain out of a molehill. ;) If your six weeks of dating are going great when you're together, and the only problem is that she doesn't respond as quickly or as often as you'd like, let this one ride. I know you're official -- but it's only been six weeks of dating. You still have a lot to get to know about each other. And just because she drops out during the day, doesn't mean she doesn't like you, is cheating on you, or is intentionally ignoring you. She's probably focused on work, friends, family and all those wonderful things that make her a well-rounded person. ;) Also, people who work out of their homes may give the impression of having lots of free time or more control over their time than they actually do. So her casual work set up may actually be more intense than you think, and when she drops out it's because she's focused on work.

One thing you can do is try to notice what types of texts you're sending her that don't get a response you like -- and change that pattern on your end. For instance, if you send her a generic, "How's your day going?" and you don't get a response you like, try something else. For instance, give her a compliment, or send her an interesting link or a funny comic. Dating is a way to get to know each other, and you're learning what works and what doesn't works. Be flexible and try something new if you don't like a response you're getting.

But, all in all, I think you're fine -- she's just busy during the day. This isn't an insult you're getting. It's just you dating a woman with a lot going on!
April Masini is a relationship and etiquette expert, author of 4 books and the #1 relationship advice forum, blue-chip corporate spokesperson and preferred go-to source for the world’s most prominent media and news outlets.

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