What you were trying to do was nearly impossible. A single mother with three kids and a full time college student are not a good match — regardless of personalities. She’s got responsibilities, and if a man is going to be in her life, he has to be one that’s going to want to settle and become a step-father. No matter how well meaning you both were, your main focus needs to be college and hers needs to be her children. You just aren’t compatible right now.
I’m sorry you’re both hurt.
For future, know yourself well and what you can and cannot do (now, in five years, and for the future), and try to choose someone who is self aware and compatible.
I hope that helps. Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter.
April Masini, your AskApril