[April Masini, your AskApril]

What great advice you got!! 😀 I agree with [b]Purple Rain[/b] and I’ll reiterate and expound a little more.

First, your situation is normal. Many men have trouble seeing their girlfriends and wives as sexual beings once they become mothers. In their heads, women are either one or the other. What you can do to help him with this is to show him that you are both of those things.

How do you do this? Good question — I’m glad you asked. 😆 Take responsibility, as [b]Purple Rain[/b] suggested, for your weight loss. You’re not alone. Most new mothers are challenged by losing baby weight, but they do it! Diet, nutrition and exercise all work. Sometimes it takes longer; sometimes not so much. But do it!

Second, make private time for you and your boyfriend. Get a babysitter for the baby and if you can afford it, go to a hotel for a sexy evening (or even a few hours!). Keep a date night that’s just the two of you. Buy lingerie. Make sure what needs to be waxed is waxed. Get a manicure and pedicure, a haircut and wear makeup. Look cute for him, just like you did when you were dating.

Third, get your flirtatious back on. Tell him how sexy he looks. Send him a hot love note. Seduce him…

As for porn, if he truly has an addiction, that’s a different problem, but I’m not sure he does as much as he just wants a sex life and doesn’t know how to have one with you given your post. My suggestion is to work on yourself (a lot easier than going to therapy to get him to change).

Let me know if that helps!

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