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4 year relationship with a child needs help! Girlfriend is c

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  • August 23, 2012 at 4:47 pm #5643
    JGarin21
    Member #157,087

    Ive made a lot of mistakes in my recent relatioship with my ex. We have an amazing 3yr old boy who we both love with our lives! I lost my family because I moved out of her parents house, I said sorry to her & she forgave me. I wasn’t happy there thats why I did it. She has hurted me with other guys in our 4 year relationship. I did my wrongs to with women but never had sex. Her in laws were driving me insane! They wouldn’t let me be father to my child! I only wanted to do things right, outside of her parents home. my way without being bad talked. I never really wanted to leave her or hurt her, I wanted to be together but from a distance. For the best of both of us because we always argued. In the mist of all our issues with life, I can tell you that we were crazy in love! But I treated her bad many times because life wasnt going good for me. I had no job, no money or car to get myself to work or to look for one! Now I lost her! She couldn’t trust me from a distance so she moved on! I have been going so hard to win my family back! Im deeply in love with her! Drives me insaine that she is with someone else! I learned a lesson from it & will never commit a mistake like that again! I learned to never bite the hand that feeds you. I had to make this mistake for me to grow up & see things a lot clearer. They already broke up twice before because she cheated on him twice with me. while dating him, she told me she loves me, missess me, wants her family back, all the good things I wanted to hear & more. Then she still goes back to that no good of a man! Im confused! She says she is confused too! I know she still loves me! Please help me! I dont know what to do! I love my family sooo much!! My son don’t deserve this!

    August 24, 2012 at 2:00 pm #25207
    April Masini, your AskApril
    Keymaster

    You need to get a job, make some money and get a home of your own. 😉 Living with your girlfriend’s parents isn’t a good idea under most circumstances. 😕

    Then, you need to get a custody order with visitation so that you can see your child and be a good father on a consistent basis.

    After you take care of that business, you can try to date her again, but it doesn’t sound like you’re good for each other based on what you’ve written, so my advice is to focus on being a good father to your son. 😉

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    August 25, 2012 at 4:29 pm #24602
    JGarin21
    Member #157,087

    Well I have a job, I’ve been working for almost a year. I make a good amount. I have my own home too. when it comes down to visitation everything is fine. We are in good terms again including her parents. The problem right now is that she is soo confused. She is constsnly running back & forth to me & her ex. She said she is confused because she feels like she loves both of us. She hates it when I’m talking to another girl. she also said to me that she wants to be a family but I dont get it! Why can’t she just be committed to me. She catches herself missing her ex, & thru also work at the same job. She lied to both of us & cheated on both of us multople times. I dont know what to do anymore.it’s hard to trust her.but I want my family back together sooo badd! But its her, shes is the problem.

    August 28, 2012 at 5:26 pm #25379
    April Masini, your AskApril
    Keymaster

    You can’t control her. I know you want your family back together, but this may be as good as it gets considering who she is. Don’t make yourself crazy by trying to turn her into something she isn’t. Instead, make the best of what you have; be clear on your own boundaries, and focus on being a good dad. If she’s all over the place, chasing her all over the place is only going to make things worse. 😕

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"April Masini answers questions no one else can and tells you the truth that no one else will."

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