[z25225582]

2 hours ago me and my girlfriend had that talk no couple ever wants!

Anyway we spoke like proper adults no arguments just plain and simple for about 30 minutes face to face , we have been together 2 months and dating a bit longer in total 1st hiccup was lastnight this is why this talk happened.

THE TALK!
I told her to say it as it is , she told me she doesnt wanna lose me and that its her own isssues shes having atm with bills , and only living in a new area where she doesnt no many people since august. shes got new job and a flat where its the first time shes lived alone so yea stress is gunna be a big factor to. she used to do drugs but only does weed now and shes finding it reall hard not to do it.
I dont drink or smoke and especially dont do drugs and i told her when we 1st met that if she ever done drugs were done no second chances.
She wanted to have a break with no contact for about a week and i told her that i odnt do breaks and that there no good for the relationship , we havent had and problems up until lastnight. she wanted to be alone and she sort her head out with her friend i said this is not a good idea you should do this urself without the opinions of a friend whos only bene in he rlife about 2 weeks.

So she was getitng a bit funny becuase i wanted to end it rather than wait for her decision on what she wants as if it was me as she said it is she shouldnt have to break up.
Ive been in this situation many times and breaks always lead to nothing more that dragging alone the relationship.
So we ended it and i asked her to promise me not to message me as i dont want this and so i can move on and that i were gunna delte he ron facebook as i didnt wanna see things that will get my head ticking. she wasnt happy one bit so we parted our ways and now im thumb twiddling as to what to do.

Uusally im quick to run back but this time for some reason i didnt shes all i can think of now and i no us breaking up just doesnt make sense but i didnt wanan feel like a liability.

Anyways of what people think i should do now?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

It sounds like the two of you were making a bigger deal over two months of dating than you needed to. Usually, the first three months of dating is a period of time when you figure out if you want to continue dating each other. Taking a break after two months of dating didn’t need to be formal — she could easily have just not seen you for a week because she was “busy” and figured out what she wanted to do. However, on the other hand, you gave her an ultimatum rather than let her figure out what she wanted to do or not, and ultimatums are never a good idea.

If you want to ask her out on a date in a week or two, and see how things are, then that might be a good idea. I don’t believe in breaks either, but since it’s only been two months since you’ve been dating, and she only needed a week on her own, it doesn’t seem like that big a deal.

You’re both allowed to make mistakes — everybody does. What you learn from them, and how you behave afterwards is what’s important. 😉

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[z25225582]

Thankyou for your reply.

Yea i didnt wanna make out the break up hurt me bad even if it wasnt for to long but i never showed it just made out like i was happy to move on. Reason i didnt wanna break up was the fact of everytime she has a rough patch she will do this and thats what made me think she should talk to me and work through it but i didnt wanna sound needy as ive been through this sorta thing before.

The thing i done get is we wer fine the day be for we break up so this must have played on her mind for a few days unless shes been getting things put in her head,

Do you think maybe say 5 days time i turn up at hers unexpected with flowers is a bad idea asking to talk?
Or should i try ringing her and asking for us to meet up.

The reason i dont wanna leave it to long on NC is the fact that i dont want her to think im moving on and that im not intrested anymore i trully do love her ands it been 2 days NC now not that she knows. it was my decision to end it as i didnt wanna wait around for her decision.

I no this is wrong of me but i got my friend to go on her facebook to see if everythings okay and people have been asking if shes alright her replies have been “im fine” anyway shes been spending time with her friends.

Thankyou

[April Masini, your AskApril]

It sounds like she already is moving on. If you’ve changed your mind about breaking up with her, you should talk to her about it — in person with flowers is better than on the phone — sooner rather than later. 😉

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