You’re afraid of rocking the boat, but in not sticking up for yourself, you’re being taken for a ride. 😕 If you want to be married, and you’ve been with your boyfriend for five years, and lived together for four years, then it’s time for you to decide what [b]your[/b] limit is — not his — yours. Clearly, he’s fine with the way things are, but when you say that he won’t like being given an ultimatum, it sounds like you’re scared of him. 🙁 I don’t suggest giving [i]him[/i] an ultimatum, but I do suggest giving [i]yourself[/i] an ultimatum. Decide how much longer you’re willing to live with him without getting married, and then stick to that plan you make for yourself. It’s fine for you to want to please him, but not if there’s no compromise.
As for his wanting you to go in on a mortgage with him, my advice is that you not get involved as a single person, with someone else’s mortgage. It’s fine for you to live with him in his house that he pays the mortgage on, but it’s unfair for him to expect you to kick in on a mortgage when you’re not married if that’s what you want.
Time to give [i]yourself[/i] some tough love!
