[fireface]

Hi April!

I’ve never been good at approaching women. I’m faced with a situation where I really liked this girl but failed to ask her out or get close to her. I think she knows. I think she lost interest. We haven’t talked in months though I see her sometimes on campus and she’s seen me.

We graduate after class this week. I’ll likely never see her again. Should I do everything in my power to approach her if I see her again? If she’s with friends, should I ask her for a moment alone?

I’m very nervous, more so because I can’t be casual nor play it too cool. I feel out of my depths but it’s a risk I gotta take. I also wish I simply get a chance.

Please advise!

[AskApril Masini]

Before the day ends, I strongly advise you to buy a book I wrote for men who want to do better dating. It’s called [b]Date Out of Your League[/b] and you can buy it here: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/date-out-of-your-league.html[/url]. It’s only $8.99. You can purchase it as an e-book that downloads automatically, and you can start reading tonight. It’s got comprehensive advice exactly for your issues.

In the meantime…. I can briefly give you some advice. The book will give you loads. 😉

Your problem isn’t really this woman as much as it is your fear of rejection — that’s going to follow you around from this woman to others if you don’t face it and decide to do something about it. You can see how fear will keep you from great opportunities if you allow it, so decide to change your own behavior from the ground up.

First, understand that dating is competitive, and there’s a chance you’ll lose — as well as a chance you’ll win. That’s a fact. 🙂 You’re not special in your possible rejection. Everyone faces it. Get the worst case scenarios out of the way, on the table, and processed, so you can move on from them. 😉

Next, you have to look at the worst case scenario carefully. [i]Absolute[/i] worst case scenario is that you never overcome your fear and lose out on many wonderful opportunities. Another one is that you get rejected. Here’s a fun fact: Nobody dies from rejection. And guess what? Rejection is actually a gift, because if a woman isn’t interested in you — why waste your time? Move on and find someone who is. So, while it’s good to compete for someone you want to date, it’s also good to know if there’s just no way because you’re not her cup of tea (or vice versa!). Then you can move on.

For now, since you haven’t spoken to this woman in months, and college is ending for you both soon, it’s important to make contact, flirt with her, and get to know her. Approaching her in person is best since you haven’t spoken in months. I’m not sure what your relationship was when you were speaking, but if you were friendly, and just haven’t seen her, then it’s fine to call her and ask her how she’s doing and if she wants to meet for coffee or see a movie next week. If she’s with friends, you can still go over and say hello and tell her you’d love to talk to her later, or maybe catch up over lunch.

I hope that helps.

Let me know how things go. 🙂

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend! [url][/url] And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

[fireface]

Thank you April.

I’ll check out the e-book for sure.

Indeed, I thought about her too much instead of being confident and flirty. I got to know her a bit already, what makes her click (which amazed me), her interests; just time has passed.

I’m not afraid of rejection. I’m just afraid I won’t get a chance, or the perfect chance. If I asked her to coffee and she declined, I’d be fine with some finality.

I guess it doesn’t matter how so long as I just do it.

[AskApril Masini]

Exactly! 🙂

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

[fireface]

I got a chance… Approached her. I introduced myself to her friends briefly, who seemed nice. I offered a handshake and she shook after a while. I asked something… Then she blew me off and stormed away with her friends following. I saw a friend later, waved, she smiled back as I shrugged… Whatever. At least I tried.

[AskApril Masini]

I think getting the book I recommended, and reading it, will help. 😉 You did the right thing by giving it a shot. Next! 🙂

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

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