[MJ7491]

scenario 1 : We had a late lunch that he paid for and we went to a gallery that we both like. He gave me a late birthday present. We went to movie after where we paid for our own tickets. There were some amount of awkward silence.

scenario 2 : We took a 2-3 hour train ride to a museum and we explored the city. We ate lunch there and I paid for it. Then we just chilled at a park near the river. We rode the same train back to the city after. We had a good enjoyable talk during the trip.

We know each other for 3 years now. We usually hang with a bunch of friends. We didn’t hang out just ourselves before. Now those happen so I am a bit thrown off and confused since I had a tiny crush on him like a year ago. But then he went on and dated a girl that I don’t like (he broke up with her after a month) and I was a bit disappointed in him. I thought my crush has already ended then but I am confused now.

Should I just think of those as friendly hang out?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

How old are you both?

[MJ7491]

I am 22 and he is turning 21 in a few months.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Thanks for the age information. 🙂

I always tell people that men and women can’t be friends. The reason is that one person wants more than the other — often at different times. This creates confusion and miscommunication at best (what you’re experiencing now), and heartache at worst. 😳

My advice is to stop being his friend, and start being a woman who’s interested in him romantically. That means that you don’t “hang out” with him — but you do flirt with him to give him a clue that you’re interested in him, so that if he wants to ask you out on a date, he has something to chase after in your flirtation.

By doing this, you’ll also end your confusion over what the status of the relationship is.

I hope that helps. 😉

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