My boyfriend and i have been together for three years now, when we first met, i let him know everything i was looking for and was always open and honest about everything to him. In this particular situation, i had let him know how much i did not like recreational use of marijuana because where i grew up i saw it everywhere and it wasn’t exactly associated with the best of people. He told me he didn’t smoke, yet later after we began dating, i found out by his family member that he did. I was shocked and upset, yet i tried not to let it ruin anything..i later spoke to him about it and he said he did do it but not so often where it was a problem. Well it turns out he was actually addicted, doing it every day. Once he got more comfortable, he started doing it around me. I tried to speak to him about it and felt as though he agreed but would blow me off. It got to the point where i asked him to at least not do it around me, but he didn’t. He would do it knowing how much it bothered me, or show up to pick me up and he was high almost every time. I finally had a long conversation about it to him and he told me would eventually stop when he felt the time was right, like when he started working and i told him if he wanted to have a family together i didn’t want that around our family. He always made it seem like there was an end point so i decided to try to help him and also wait it out. Well about a month ago he stopped, he started having bad nightmares among other symptoms and today he told me how he can’t wait to retire working in order to start again. And that if he could he would start right now. Its really upsetting to feel like I’ve been tricked into an idea that he knew he wouldn’t keep. He told me he would do it whether i liked it or not and that he enjoyed it that much. I feel as though no matter what i say, his addiction is so strong, i don’t know what to say or do. Do you think it could just be something he is saying because he is currently withdrawing from not having done it in a while. Or is an addict just too difficult to have a relationship with?
