[euzebije]

Ok, i ll try to explain my situation. My gf went for a season job, and we agreed that she ll stay there for a month and then we go to vacation together. We heard on a phone regulary and it was all fine (kisses, love,missing each other etc.).4 days before date we agreed that i come and pick her up she suddenly stopped answering my texts. So, after 2 days on no contact i sat in car and went to see her.

On half way there i recived text from her that she is sorry but she need some time alone and she will stay there for another month. i went to her anyway and we had short conversation where she told me that she need break to decide about her life and relationship and everything.I was emotionaly devastated but didnt do anything stupid.

I decided to NC her so she can get her space. I stayed for 2 days in town nearby still in hope. 2nd day she texted me if i want her to meet on coffie and i politely declined. 3rd day she sent text that shee feels like piece of shit. I responded that i feel same and feeling confused and betrayed by her, and that now i need some time and space either.

But what i feel was mistake, that i sent another message where i explained that i still love her and that i m going to take some trip for couple of weeks and so. She just said, ok, have a safe trip.

Now i think that i should have stick to NC and just answer: sorry you feel that way, without explaining my emotions and plans, so she can just sit and wondering what is happening with me.

So i would like to hear some opinions did i make a mistake, and what to do next? She really acted like shit towards me, but i really love her and want to get her back, but not in the way like it was till now where she had dominance over relationship. (which i belive might be just a reason she dumped me because i became completely devoted to her, needy and all that stuff 😕 )

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Try and get clear on what you want, separate from how you feel. 😉 She decided she needed a break in the relationship and she wasn’t graceful about asking for it, but she clearly did. Now, you’re hurt and angry that she broke up with you the way she did, but you want her back, too.

If she broke up with you because you were too needy, understand that that is not a very attractive quality, and you’re going to have a problem with anyone you’re with if you don’t keep that in check. So while you work on that issue, my advice is to back off. If, in a month or so, you feel you have that more under control, you can ask her out on a date again and see where the two of you stand. But if you try to get her back now, not having solved the issues that led to the break up, you’ll just find yourself in more of the same problem.

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