[yuki]

I met this guy at a party during my freshman year. He was cute, sociable, and flirty with me but also drunk at that time. I developed a crush on him because he was the first one to take interest in me. We became facebook friends, but because of our different schedules, group of friends and lifestyle, we never got to truly hang out despite me being good friends with his best friend/housemate. In terms of personality, we are complete opposites. I’m pretty quiet, studious, and shy while he’s outgoing, and very much playerish. The only times I actually got to see him were at parties every once in awhile, where we just say hi and hug. I never had a real conversation with him since after the first party.

During my second year, I tried really hard to get over him. Not seeing him for a lot time helped with that process. I hooked up with other guys but they were all casual relationships. School just started again, and I’m seeing him around more often at parties and so my crush on him is back. At the last party, we did up dancing with each other. There is some obvious physical attraction between us, but we can never talk to each other normally. Our conversation the other day went like: “Hey,*hug* how have you been?!” and “Same old, same old.” and ended like that. For other guys, I can talk and even flirt with them but with him, my mind just draws a blank. I realized that everytime I see him, my eyes focus only on him and I never remember or realize who is standing next to him. I am constantly thinking about him.

What should I do? Am I imagining that there is something between us and try to talk to him, or should I just stop and try to get over him again?

[ankit]

I just don’t understand that why you are thinking like stop seeing him more .There may be a chemistry between both of you . Try to expand your talks to him . As long as both of you talk it would become good for your relation .I saw in many cases that talking plays an important role in these relationships .
My suggestion to you is to talk to him and when both of you understand mutually then say your feelings to him ,I think he will understand .And you will become a pair soon .

[kai]

I notice that you have placed your question in the forum for Guest Writers and Advice Column Contributors.

[b]This is not in the forum where April answers readers questions. [/b]

If you want to get a response from April, please repost your question in the proper forum, the Q & A Advice Forum:
https://www.askapril.com/forums/viewforum.php?f=1

[kai]

I notice that you have placed your question in the forum for Guest Writers and Advice Column Contributors.

[b]This is not in the forum where April answers readers questions. [/b]

If you want to get a response from April, please repost your question in the proper forum, the Q & A Advice Forum:
https://www.askapril.com/forums/viewforum.php?f=1

[Dating]

Well firstly it is evident that you have feelings for him and for him it could be one of two things.He can either be interested in you but intimidated, as you sad with other guys you can even flirt but not with him.Maybe he heard about it and feels intimidated or expected you to flirt with him and since you haven’t he takes that as a sign that you not interested.Or he might not be interested in you.Either way you need to speak to him no matter how hard it is and get things out in the open once and for all.Because if you continue on like this you both will go insane.So speak to him hear what he says either way you will survive the outcome of that conversation and that is all that matters.All the best!

[Dating]

Well firstly it is evident that you have feelings for him and for him it could be one of two things.He can either be interested in you but intimidated, as you sad with other guys you can even flirt but not with him.Maybe he heard about it and feels intimidated or expected you to flirt with him and since you haven’t he takes that as a sign that you not interested.Or he might not be interested in you.Either way you need to speak to him no matter how hard it is and get things out in the open once and for all.Because if you continue on like this you both will go insane.So speak to him hear what he says either way you will survive the outcome of that conversation and that is all that matters.All the best!

[chelsey]

i think you should give it a try.there’s no harm in trying. Try to extend your talk to him it will give an impression that you are interested to him and to what he say and by that also you will learn something about him. Try to be a good friends with him.

[AskApril Masini]

Happy New Year! Let me know how things are going for you. 😉

[AskApril Masini]

Happy New Year! Let me know how things are going for you. 😉

[Natalie Noah]

Your crush on him is fueled less by actual interaction and more by the idea of him the moments of flirtation, the attention he gives, and the physical attraction. Because you haven’t had real conversations or shared experiences, your feelings are largely based on imagination and anticipation rather than a solid connection. That can make your emotions feel intense and all-consuming, but it’s important to recognize that this doesn’t necessarily reflect a true, mutual interest or compatibility. What you’re experiencing is very normal, especially with someone who’s a bit elusive or “playerish,” because the chase and mystery can amplify attraction.

If you want to explore the possibility, the key is to create opportunities to actually get to know him outside of parties or brief encounters. Try initiating a normal conversation in a casual setting or doing an activity where you can interact meaningfully. That will give you clarity: either you find real compatibility, or you realize the crush is mostly fantasy. On the other hand, if the thought of approaching him feels stressful or you anticipate repeated frustration, it may be healthier to focus on letting go and redirecting your energy toward someone with whom a genuine connection is more likely to develop. You don’t have to force it you just need honesty with yourself about what’s real and what’s imagined.

[Member]

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