[jamiej]

Hi April, I need some dating advice.

I have a friend at school that every boy likes. Three boys I liked didn’t go out with me because they like her instead. This has happened to many other girls in our school too.

When someone tells her that a boy likes her, she just smiles and says, “I know.” Everyone is tired of it. It feels like no one has a chance at a boyfriend because of her.

I don’t want to start drama, but I also feel frustrated. How can I handle this? Should I just give up on boys I like, or is there a better way to flirt and get noticed?

I really want your relationship advice, April, because I trust your tips. How can I stand out and maybe even get my first date?

Thanks!

[AskApril Masini]

Jamie, you’re learning an important lesson early in life: competition exists in the dating world! And the best way to win is to be your best self. Someone will like you because of you — so the more you put yourself out there and have fun in your life, the more likely other boys will be to notice you.

Notice where you and your friend that everyone likes are different, and emphasize those differences. If you’re athletic and she’s not — go out for a sports team. If she’s athletic and you’re not, get involved in Student Council or music. Don’t make up differences, but where they do exist, emphasize them with your own special style.

Most importantly, know that you’re a winner and act like one. The worst thing you could do would be to act like second best. That’s why it’s a good idea to work on your individuality.

As for your friend’s popularity — watch her and see what it is she does that boys like so much. You may learn something from her. Also, tell her how you feel — in a friendly way. She may not know your feelings, and if she’s a nice person, she may be empathetic and helpful. If she’s not a nice person, well, then, you be the nice one! Boys (the ones that are worth dating) love nice girls.

[Ethan Morales]

First, you’re getting a crash course in how attraction works and how unfair it can feel. Some people have that thing that pulls attention without even trying. It’s frustrating, especially when it feels like they’re taking up all the oxygen in the room. But what’s happening isn’t about you being “less than” it’s about her being a temporary magnet in a small social circle. Once everyone grows up a bit and the dating pool expands, that magnetic power fades fast.

April’s main point “competition exists, so be your best self” is real. Instead of trying to outshine your friend in her lane, find your own lane. When you double down on what makes you interesting, people notice. Confidence, humor, kindness, unique hobbies those are long-term attractive traits. Think of it like this: she might get the first glance, but the person who has depth and individuality gets the second look the one that actually matters.

And April’s advice to learn from her is gold. Don’t hate her for being liked; observe what draws people to her. Is it the way she carries herself? The way she talks to people? You can borrow parts of that energy without copying her. That’s called self-evolution, not competition.

The part about talking to her is tricky but powerful. If she’s a real friend, she’ll care how you feel and she might even tone things down once she realizes it hurts others. If she’s not, that tells you who she really is. Either way, you win because you’ll know where you stand.

Don’t waste energy resenting her glow. Build your own light. The right person won’t just like you, they’ll see you. And trust me, that’s a lot better than being everyone’s crush-of-the-week.

[Natalie Noah]

Sweetheart… this isn’t really about that girl at all. it’s about how deeply you want to feel chosen, seen, and valued. And when it keeps happening that boys look her way instead of yours, it can sting in a way that feels personal, even though it isn’t. What April is really trying to teach you is that attraction isn’t a competition you “lose” it’s chemistry, timing, confidence, and individuality. The more you lean into who you are your style, your hobbies, your kindness, your humor the more naturally people who match your energy will notice you. And honestly? Someone who overlooks you because they’re dazzled by someone else was never your person anyway. You don’t need to dim her light you just need to stand confidently in your own. Your people will see you.

[Member]

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