[Anonymous]

So I think I’ve fell out of love with my girlfriend of the past 2 years. My problem is, I don’t show it. Just kinda keep it bundled up inside of me. I still love her, just not the way I used to. and she still loves me alot. Even brought up engagement a few times… I’m having the hardest time trying to figure out how to break up with her. She moved here from another state to be with me, and if I were to split up with her she would have to move back to her home town. I don’t know how to tell her and I don’t want to end this relationship with her mad at me. What’s also made it harder is we have recently been looking at apartments together and she is excited about moving out together (we currently live with my mother). Any help would be appriciated

[Anonymous]

There is no easy way to break up with her but you owe it to her and you. Just be honest. I”ve been in the situation where I moved to another state to be with someone. We both knew it wasnt working after a while but neither of us wanted to admit it. I stay for longer then I should’ve and honestly my only regret is that he never said anything sooner and neither did I. I don’t regret moving to try and be with him and then moving away my only regret is that I stayed there longer then I should’ve. I guess this will probably be her biggest regret if you don’t tell her how you feel. Unfortunately people get hurt when they breakup but life goes on. Anyone gets excited talking about engagements and looking at apartments but deep down she probably does realize something is wrong and is just pushing that feeling away.

[Anonymous]

This is my first real relationship, and definetly my first time I’ve had to break up with someone, so I’m just not sure how to do it.. Especially when it’s been 2 years and she still thinks I’m as happy as I was at day one…

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I know you don’t want to hurt her feelings, but you’re stuck between two difficult realities. 🙁 Either you continue dating her and bottle your feelings inside, lying to her all the time by making her think you do still want to be with her, 😳 or you be honest and break up with her because for you it’s over, and you set her free and give her the chance to find someone who does want her. You have to pick the better of two choices that are BOTH going to hurt — one more than the other, one sooner rather than later, and one a LOT more than the other.

Rejection is part of life, and while she will be hurt, she will also get over that hurt — I promise. It’s also a lot worse to not love someone and keep them tied up in a dishonest relationship when they could be free and looking for Mr. Right. So sit down with her and tell her the truth. Be very clear with her that you love her, but you don’t want to be in the relationship with her any more because for you, the relationship is finished. Be kind. Listen. Be empathetic, but be honest — above all, be honest.

I hope that helps — let me know how it goes. And join me on AskApril.com on Facebook — I want to see you there at this link: [url][/url]. 🙂

[Member]

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