[Sarah86]

I’m facing a predicament at the moment with my boyfriend of 1 year and I’d love some advice.

He was born abroad and after 5 years of living here, he has finally decided to move back home – but not until next July/Aug.

Basically, his family is starting to get older and he wants to spend more time with them, plus he’s bored at work and needs a new challenge that he just can’t get here.

I love him so much, but would never consider relocating myself. He’s left the decision about what’s on the cards for us for the next year with me. When he told me three weeks ago we were both distraught and I thought that I’d just enjoy the next few weeks with him until I got my head together. It took it’s toll last week and I can’t stop thinking about it and constantly break into tears.

I have so much fun with him but his departure is always at the back of my mind. I don’t know if I should block him from my life now (and miss out on great times we still could have ahead), slowly try and ‘wind’ down how much I see him with the hopes feelings will slowly go away, or hang in there til he leaves and risk a much worse broken heart? It’s a lose/lose situation but I’d love to hear your thoughts.

With every single one of my friends in a serious relationship and so many group ‘couples’ outings, I know this is going to make it even worse for when I eventually cut the cord.

Thoughts are much appreciated.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I know you’re upset and disappointed that things are ending and he’s moving back to his home country, but the fact that he is, and he’s making it clear [i]is actually a gift to you.[/i] He isn’t ready to marry you or else he’d ask, and all your friends are marrying, and clearly, that’s on your mind and you want to be part of that community. Your disappointment is obvious, but his clarity is going to allow you to do the right thing [b]for you. [/b]

My advice is to move on now. It’s important that you take of yourself in life, and if a man isn’t going to give you what you want (and vice verse), then you’re wasting time staying with him. This kind of incompatibility is a deal breaker.

Next, read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], which is a book I wrote for women who want to find, get and keep Mr. Right. You can purchase it on the site I just gave you or on the sites for Amazon or Barnes & Noble. The book will help you navigate and win in the dating game — which is what you’re going to start entering as soon as you break up with your boyfriend.

I hope that after you read the book, you’ll be able to better weed out men who aren’t Mr. Right, so you don’t waste another year with someone who isn’t going to be the person you’re hoping to find. Be honest with yourself about what you want, and date efficiently so you find someone who wants the same thing you do, and who is compatible and very clearly, your Mr. RIght. 😀

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Member]

Posts