[Anonymous]

ok it was about a month ago when I got the “we have to talk” phrase. she wanted her space and I gave it to her. now last week i see her and shes amazingly friendly, I mean we hung out a few times and it was just like we were back together. By this point i felt as if i could really give this another try. well today she texts me asking how i was and what i was up to. she said she was watchin our favorite show and I decided to be cute n say “o i c. how dare you watch without me”. well she comes back and says im watchin it with someone. turns out shes with a guy already. now to me this sounds like she was trying to keep me wanting her so if she dumps him she has me to go back to.
now this sucks because no matter how screwed up it sounds, I still love her! I mean how do i go about getting her back? because I know her new toy doesnt mean anything. everyone tells me im dumb and shes not worth it and I try to tell myself that but in the end i want her back in my arms. I dont know. you tell me
thanks

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You can’t always get what you want. 😥

If your girlfriend told you she needed space, and after a week or so, still flirts with you, but is also dating other guys, you have the option of asking her out on a date, and trying to date her again, or doing what she’s doing by dating other women, and her (this might make her realize what she’s throwing away in you — or she may realize she doesn’t care if you’re dating other women), or you can decide that you only want to date women who think you’re the man who makes them feel that they want you and only you. Your choice!

Decide what you want, but understand that you can’t make her decide what she wants. That’s her decision and her prerogative.

[Anonymous]

thanks alot for the reply. but do you think i may be rite about her jus keeping me wanting her if she dumps him? Iv heard so much about this guy and he all i hear is that hes always talking about one nite stands n basically he uses woman. the total opposite of me. i mean i no im not that “too nice” of a guy. i brought her breakfast in bed and took her on romantic dates. surprised her with so many things. any advice on how i could have her crawling back?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If you’re right, that she’s just keeping you around in case this new guy doesn’t work out, why is that something you’d want? Don’t you want to be the number one guy in a woman’s life? Instead, she’s got you playing back up guy, while she dates around to see if she can find someone better than you. There’s nothing good for you in a relationship with this woman.

You may want to get her to come “crawling back” to you, but that’s a fantasy. Let’s stick to reality. It’s a much safer place to live! 😉

You need to focus on yourself, and see yourself as deserving of true love, respect and romance. Once you genuinely see yourself as worthy, you’re going to attract a woman who’s also deserving of true love, respect and romance — and you’ll both be willing to give as good as you get.

Forget this ex-girlfriend. She’s moved on, and she’s manipulating you into sitting on the bench in case she decides to put you into play. That’s a demeaning place for any guy (or girl) to be.

Move on and start dating other women. You’ll find someone wonderful out there as soon as you let your ex go and make space in your life for Ms. Right. 🙂

[Member]

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