[johntaylor]

Hey April,

I’m an American male currently working in China (I’m ethically chinese but I grew up in the US, though I speak fluent Chinese).
A few months ago I met this girl in China through a mutual friend. She is a doctor although she seems a bit unhappy with her job as doctors are not treated nearly as well in China compared to the US.
She’s a few years older than me (she’s 28 I’m 25).
When we first met we didn’t get to hang out much because I had to relocate to a different town, but recently I’ve relocated in her hometown (I’ve decided to start my own business) so we can now see each other regularly.
Our main method of contact was just chatting MSN occasionally (I admit I always thought she was kind of pretty) and often she would take the initiative to text and message me.
So last week I’ve settled back down in her hometown and I asked if she wanted to meet up. She agreed to meet up next week at a mutual friend’s inn to watch a movie (she brought up the watch a movie thing).
If you wouldn’t mind the naive questions :):
1) From the looks of it, does her interest level seem high?
2) Do you have any second date idea? What about an amusement park trip? Or does the traditional movie sound a bit better?
3) What’s a good way “bring up” the second date? Should I ask for a commitment then?
4) Any “don’t dos” I should avoid (I don’t date much, sorry :s)

Thanks April. Your help is much appreciated.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

[quote]1) From the looks of it, does her interest level seem high? [/quote]

From what you’ve written, I wouldn’t say it’s high, but I’d say she’s interested.

[quote]2) Do you have any second date idea? What about an amusement park trip? Or does the traditional movie sound a bit better?[/quote]

Without knowing her, the amusement park trip seems like a really fun idea, and the traditional movie is fine, too. My advice is to wait and see how the first date goes. You might get to know her a little better and find out there’s something that she’s always wanted to do, or something she loves doing — or that she’s petrified of amusement parks!

[quote]3) What’s a good way “bring up” the second date? Should I ask for a commitment then?[/quote]

Call her a day or two after your first date and ask her out on the second date. This gives her a chance to wonder if you’re going to ask her out — and to hope you are, and be excited when you do!

[quote]4) Any “don’t dos” I should avoid (I don’t date much, sorry :s)[/quote]

If you want to get the entire scoop, you should buy and read Date Out of Your League, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/date-out-of-your-league.html[/url], a book I wrote for men who want to win with women. It’s got everything you’ll need. 😀

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[johntaylor]

Hi April,
Ｕnfortunately she ended up not showing up at that day because she needed to help her cousin with something.
Ｓｈｅ　ｒｅｐｅａｔｅｄｌｙ　ａｐｏｌｏｇｉｚｅｄ　ｔｏ　ｍｅ　ｈｏｗｅｖｅｒ　ｗｈｅn I　ａｓｋｅｄ　ｈｅｒ　ｆｏｒ　ａｎｏｔｈｅｒ　ｔｉｍｅ　ｓｈｅ　ｓａｙｓ　ｆｏｒ　ｔｈｅ　ｎｅｘｔ　ｔｗｏ　ｗｅｅｋｓ　ｓｈｅｓ　ｏｎ　ｃａｌｌ　ａｌｌ　ｗｅｅｋ　ａｎｄ　ｇｅｔｓ　ｈｏｍｅ　ｔｏｏ　ｔｉｒｅｄ．　Ｓｈｅ　ｎｅｖｅｒ　ｄｉｒｅｃｔｌｙ　ｓａｉｄ　ｎｏ　ｂｕｔ　ｓｉｍｐｌｙ　ｓａｉｄ　ｓｈｅ　ｃａｎ＇ｔ　ｍａｋｅ　　ｆｉｒｍ　ｔｉｍｅ　ｙｅｔ　ａｎｄ　ｉｔｓ　ｂｅｔｔｅｒ　ｔｈａｔ　ｓｈｅ　ｃｏｎｔａｃｔ　ｍｅ？

Ｉｓ　ｓｈｅ　ａｃｔｕａｌｌｙ　ｊｕｓｔ　ｔｏｏ　ｂｕｓｙ　ｏｒ　ｉｓ　ｓｈｅ　ｊｕｓｔ　ｎｏｔ　ｉｎｔｅｒｅｓｔｅｄ？　Ｉｓ　ｉｔ　ｂｅｔｔｅｒ　Ｉ　ｊｕｓｔ　ｍｏｖｅ　ｏｎ？
Ｗｈａｔ　ｓｈｏｕｌｄ　Ｉ do if you think I　ｓｔｉｌｌ　ｈａｖｅ　ａ　ｃｈａｎｃｅ？

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Why don’t you wait a few weeks and then ask her out again? She might have really been telling you the truth and not just making up an excuse. But if she says no again, then you’ll know for sure that she’s not interested.

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