[Anonymous]

I like this girl at work and when she found out that I liked her she became interested in me. We would never talk but I would catch her staring at me. If we walked by each other in the hallway she would stare at the ground and never say hi. Finally after months of this going on I get the nerves to sit next to her at lunch and I ask her out for coffee. She says yes and we exchange screen names so we can make plans over the computer. Well she never logged on during the weekend like she said she would and I was so hurt.

The next time at work she doesn’t say hi to me or go near me or give me any explantion why she stood me up. I still noticed that she would stare at me still. Well her ex boyfriend happens to work there so I decide to ask him what is up with her. He tells me how she was so excited that I finally asked her out on a date. He then tells me that she has issues one of them being that she has a boyfriend. He tells me that she doesn’t really like him, she barely sees him but is having trouble breaking it off with him. He also tells me that her boyfriend is a loser and treats her really bad. He says that I seem like a really cool guy and he is trying to nudge her towards me.

I felt a lot better after my talk with him. Now three weeks has gone by and I will sit by her during break every now and then. I have tried to talk with her on the computer but she has logged off three times when I have tried to talk to her. I have given up trying to log on the computer and talk to her. I am also starting to give up sitting with her on breaks or lunch. She never sits by me its always got to be me going up to her and sitting down. Her ex boyfriend still says she likes me. Another girl I work with told her what a great guy I was. All she does now is say hi to me. The last time we worked she turned her head 10 times in a two hour period to look at me. I know she likes me still but I feel like she doesn’t want to get to know me while she has a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do. This girl I feel like is a perfect match for me and would be worth the wait. But I feel she is pushing me away. Do I stop sitting next to her during breaks? Do I only say hi when she walks by me? Do I ignore her all together? I feel like if I just sit back and wait she will come to me when the time is right. but I am so worried that she might stop liking me and I won’t ever get a chance to show her what a great guy I am. I don’t want to pressure her but I want her to know that I am still into her. What should my next move be?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

What on earth about this woman makes you think she is “a perfect match” for you?? 😕

You asked her out on a date for coffee, and she completely blew you off. Then every time you try and talk to her or log on, all she gives you is a “hi” at best, and you’re hanging this hope of a great relationship on the fact that you catch her staring at you during work? Maybe she’s just near sighted, and can’t see what she’s looking at. 😐

My advice to you is to move on and find someone else to date. Compatibility starts with shared conversations and an interest in mutual dates. If she’s not conversing with you and she won’t go out with you, there’s not much there to bank on.

I bet there are lots of other women who would be interested in you and who would jump at the chance to go on a date with you! Find [i]them.[/i] 🙂

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