Just last year I went through a divorce. It wasn’t that bad actually – we just got really bored with each other. A few months later I met this guy, who is very generous, kind, compassionate, but has lots of problems of financial character. He lost his job not that long ago, and has to pay child support to his ex. When we just met we decided to just enjoy each others company, and have fun. Before I knew it I was falling for him. He helped me moving when I had tough times, and I ended up being his roommate (there are 3 other people living in the house, and I have my own room). Later on we had an honest open talk and he told me, that he cannot be in a relationship with me, because he cannot provide for me (even though I told him that I don’t need anything from him – I’ve been providing for myself since I was 18!). He said that he can fall in love with me, but he wouldn’t allow himself to do it because he doesn’t want to get hurt. So I ended up to be the one, who gets hurt.
Anyway – our so-called “friendship with benefits” been going on for a few months now, and sometimes he is acting all affectionate towards me, but then two days later he pulls away all cold and distant. He tells me that he really appreciates me as his friend, and when he is depressed or feeling low – he always comes to me for comfort.
One day I got sick of him playing me like that and told him to stay away from my bed. I love him and want him, but I couldn’t allow him to use me like that any longer. And while I understand all of this, I can’t help myself – I am in pain from just being around him every day, and not being able to show my feelings, or get similar in response. At the present moment I can’t move out of that house either due to some financial issues. And I don’t know how to make myself get over him. He respects my decision and is not bugging me, but I feel like this minimum communication is unbearable to me, because we use to have so much fun just interacting with each other, talking, watching movies, etc. Please help, I am so lost!
