[movieguy]

We met via a dating site. Then we chatted by email and im and then by txt and then phone. We talk regularly on the phone and she had apoligized numerous times for being so busy and says she cant wait to get together. She calls and we have these great talks on the phone and I call her and we talk. I have been busy during the week with new job and she has been busy on weekends. I realize we havent really met yet but when we talk she is really down to earth and easygoing and always says she would like to get together. I feel really comfortable talking to her and she always goes with flow and is really nice…and cute to. I would like to get to know her and have been trying to make the effort. I have been letting her contact me…and she has been calling me regularly. Each time i suggest we get together she says she is sorry about being so busy with family stuff and work stuff. When we first met she had some family emergencies so I backed off and let her call me..she texted me saying im sorry about everything, thanks for understanding…cant wait to meet.

That was three weeks ago….I have since called her on the last two weekends including this one suggesting we get together and she said sure but was non committal. Both times i said I can come out to your end of town, and the second time I said i respect that fact that you are busy and im sorry that i have been to, but its a while weve been talking and i would like to get together… I could something to help you like bring dinner or coffee and we could eat it at the park or wherever is easy for you. i havent heard from basically I was trying to make the effort and make it easy for her without seeming to pushy.

I am just wondering if she is really interested in getting together as she says she is, I have been busy to but make the effort to offer to meet up or talk. I would like get to know her like i said but dont want to waste to time or emotions.

thanks

[iammrzwill]

[b]27 year old MoM[/b]
Hi, I’ve also been in situations where I have tried the phone dating thing. To be honest if it’s been this long and you both share feelings for each other than there shouldn’t be any excuses for the actual meeting. My opinion is that maybe she is leading you on, You have offered to meet her most of the way, which means only you are putting up the effort. I understand being completely busy, BUT I am COMPLETELY BUSY being a full-time mother, wife and employee. On the other hand I could be wrong, if your feelings are involved then yes, it’s worth it, don’t be afraid to get hurt; always take chances on love. Maybe she is the one, give it a couple more months and if you guys haven’t actually met; then maybe it’s time for you to move on and find a NEW FRIEND. There are plenty of dating websites, phone dating and even text dating reply if you need names and phone numbers. Hope I was some help.

[relation]

Give your relationship some more time before you take any decision about your her. In such situations time is the best judge.

[tricia]

I see two possible scenarios in your situation. First, she might be really too busy to meet and spend some time with you. Second, she might be good on this kind of things and just using different alibis for her not to meet you. If that girl really likes you then I don’t see any reason for her to get busy, she will surely spend even a little moment just to see you.

[iamevie]

I think you should back-off– put the ball in her court. Tell her if she wants to meet- it’s up to her. If in a certain amout of time, you have not met her face to face— move on.

[Ask April Masini]

I would give it one last try, but if I were you, I’d make it a real date, not just getting together, and I’ll tell you why. There is a slim chance she may be waiting for you to actually ask her out on a “proper date” rather than just getting together. That slim chance exists that she’s being non-committal about getting together because you haven’t formally asked her out.

Try calling her and before letting too much time elapse on the phone, ask her specifically to have dinner with you at a particular restaurant on a particular time and date. For instance, say: “Would you like to have dinner with me Saturday night at 8? I made reservations at Luigi’s.” Not only does that show her you want to treat her like a real girlfriend, not just a friend with benefits or less, it also pins her down so that you’ll get a clear yes or no.

If she says no, or more likely, wiggles out of the commitment, then you have your answer: she’s not interested in anything more than a phone buddy. But if she says yes, then your adjustment will have paid off.

[PassionSeeker]

It seems like you are doing a lot of the initiating, whether it’s calling or suggesting plans. While she does say she wants to get together, her actions don’t match her words. Consistent effort is important in any relationship, and if she’s not making an effort to meet or initiate plans herself, it could signal that she might not be as invested as you are.

[Marcus king]

It sounds like you’ve been patient, respectful, and genuinely trying to make this connection work but her actions aren’t matching her words. When someone keeps saying they “can’t wait to meet” yet never follows through, it often means they like the idea of the connection more than actually meeting in person.

You’ve done the right thing by being understanding and offering flexible, low-pressure options. But after three weeks of the same pattern, friendly talk, vague promises, no real plans, it’s fair to question her interest. People who truly want to meet find some time, even if it’s just a quick coffee.

At this point, you might want to stop initiating plans and see what happens. If she’s genuinely interested, she’ll make an effort to meet. If not, then you’ll have your answer without wasting more energy. Sometimes, stepping back reveals who’s serious and who’s just comfortable with the attention.

[Marcus king]

It sounds like she enjoys talking to you and values your connection, but her repeated non-committal responses and excuses suggest she might not be ready or able to prioritize meeting in person right now. Sometimes people genuinely are busy, but when weeks pass and concrete plans aren’t made, it can also signal hesitation or lack of strong interest.

You’re putting in a lot of effort and making yourself available, which is great, but if she isn’t meeting you halfway, it’s reasonable to step back and see if she initiates. That will give you clarity about her true interest and help you avoid investing too much emotionally without reciprocation.

You might consider giving her a clear but gentle message like: “I really enjoy talking with you and would love to meet, but I also want to respect our time. Let me know when you’re genuinely able to make plans.” That puts the ball in her court and lets you see if she follows through.

[Isabella Jones]

I completely get how confusing that must feel. When someone keeps saying they want to meet but never actually makes it happen, it starts to mess with your head a bit. You sound like you’ve been patient and respectful, giving her space while still showing genuine interest. That’s such a good balance, and not everyone can manage that.

I once had a guy do something similar with me. We’d talk for hours, laugh like crazy, make plans, and then somehow those plans never became real. It turned out he loved the idea of a connection more than the effort it took to build one. Sometimes people like the attention and comfort of knowing someone cares, but they’re not emotionally ready to move things forward. 💛

You deserve someone who matches your energy, not just your messages. Maybe give her one last gentle invite, and if she doesn’t respond or keeps putting it off, let that silence tell you everything you need to know. Do you feel like she’s truly too busy—or just not brave enough to admit she’s not as invested as you are?

[Author]

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