[shaywest]

Hi,

I’m wondering how much time is okay for my live in boyfriend to hang out with his friends. He hangs out with his friends every week Monday to Thursday for three and a half to four each day. Then on Friday and Saturday he hangs out all day and all night. However Friday and Saturday night he do come in around 11pm or 12pm or so. He never just spend the entire night out, but he do be out for about 16 hours. Alos sometimes during the week he may leave at 7am and not return until 10pm or so. I’m wondering is this normal and should I be okay with this sort of behavior??

[April Masini, your AskApril]

How long have you been living together? Dating? How old are you both? Does he have a job that allows him that much free time?

[shaywest]

We’ve been living together for five months now but have been dating for two years. He’s twenty seven and I’m thirty. He works for himself so yes his job does allow him free time.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Thank you for the extra information! What you’re describing can be normal for some couples, and not normal for others. The real trick to figuring out if this is a problem or not is if the amount of time he’s spending with friends has changed, and if so, how much. If he’s been like this the entire time you’ve been living together, then something is up, but if he’s always been like this, then this is normal for him, and no matter who he was dating, he’d be like this.

If you’d like to spend more time with him, then invite him to do things that you think he’d like, and make the time together make him feel good about being with you. 😎

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