[hubbsme0920]

Not only is this the woman I want and need to be with, she is everything I want to spend the rest of my life with! I know this and I know she is the one. Ive been in relationships but I have never felt what I feel when shes around. I want to tell her everything I feel but anytime I want to say something the only thing that wants to come out is ‘I love you’…..at this point im literally shaking and so nervous I talk myself out of it. Im at the same point now I miss her so much it makes my stomach hurt and it only gets worse as each day passes! I dont know how to get to her heart and the one thing I do know for sure is that im lost without her….she is in nursing school and I dont wantbto distract her but I need her! PLEASE HELP ME! Sorry and thank you

[AskApril Masini]

Ask her out on a date! 😉

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[hubbsme0920]

Easier said than done. I lose all confidence I shake im nervous im open and vulnerable and nothing comes out right! I try so hard and mess things up like I always do…ive never had this problem b4, I have never in my life felt what she makes me feel, I didnt even know it was possible to feel this way:) But its all one sided it feels which hurts more than anything and I guess if I find out she doesn’t want to see me then I lose the bit of hope that gets me through each day and without that Id not only love the one woman who doesnt love me back and Ill have no hope….im truly scared for the first time

[AskApril Masini]

If you write back, let me know how old you are. That always helps me give you better advice. 😉

The problem is that if you’re not willing to do what it takes to ask her out on a date, I don’t think you’ll be able to win her over. 😳 But then I looked at your question title, again, and realized that what you wrote is that you want to get to her heart. Does that mean you want to confess your feelings in a one-way relationship situation? Because if that’s all you want, you can simply write her a letter and tell her how you feel. That should prevent you from having to be in her presence, which seems to really freak you out. However, if you do write her a confessional letter, be prepared for her to be creeped out by the onslaught of feelings from someone she doesn’t know. 😳

If getting to her heart means you want to win her over and make her fall in love with you, then you have to be someone she’s going to find attractive. That means you can’t be so self-involved. You have to start behaving in ways that will be attractive to her. Nervousness and anxiety aren’t sexy in a guy. 😕 Women love confidence. They love a sense of humor. They like men who are successful and good at things. So, play up those qualities, and if you don’t have them, work at attaining them. 😀

I understand that you’re nervous, but you’re not the first or last person to be nervous or to have a tremendous crush. It’s normal. 😉 But you can’t be lazy. You have to be willing to do the work to get to know her. And it’s okay to have feelings, but if you’re going to let them dictate your life, you’re going to have trouble with relationships. Sometimes you have to have your feelings, and then do what’s right, even if it’s uncomfortable. We all do that. 🙂

Check out a book I wrote for men who want to win with women. It’s called [b]Date Out Of Your League[/b], and you can buy it here: [url]https://askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/date-out-of-your-league.html[/url]. Read it. I think it will help you a lot.

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[slapszid]

hi,zid here this is the situation of my relationship, i have a girl and we broke up a week ago,i dont know if its really a break up.
coz she said to me that she really need some time coz she doesnt know who she is. she said that she need to change but she
really dont need to change coz i love her just the way she is. but in our conversation in her school she said that she doesnt love me anymore and it really breaks my heart.i really don’t know, I confront her that if there is someone else? And she said frankly that there is no someone else and she has no suitors.
We are both 21 years of age and we have a work. She is a teacher and I’m a costumer service representative. Till now I did not contact her nor text or call her coz maybe she really need some time to think about who really she is. But in the other side maybe she will think that I have no concern to her coz she doesn’t any saw a glimpse of me. What should I do I really love her.. and I need her. .is really love change or fade in an instant? we are both happy and comfortable in before this happen i dont understand. I don’t know what to do..it really blows my mind.can you give a sort of advice? And there’s a lot more that I want to tell. .if you can possibly response on me. .

Thanks,

[AskApril Masini]

I would love to answer your question — but first, please post it as a new question, and not as a response to the one before it. As soon as you repost this as a new one, I’ll answer it there. Each question has it’s own string of responses, back and forth, so it’s easy to understand the conversation. 😉

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[Ethan Morales]

Your emotions are intense, which is completely normal, especially if this is someone you feel strongly about. But the way you’re experiencing it stomach hurting, shaking, constantly thinking about her is showing that your feelings are overwhelming your ability to act strategically. Right now, you’re in “crush mode,” which can make you come across as desperate if you don’t channel it properly.

April’s advice makes sense: there are two paths here, and each has consequences: Confession-only approach (writing a letter or telling her directly): Pros: You get to express your feelings; you won’t have to face her in person while overwhelmed. Cons: If she doesn’t feel the same, it can feel like a big emotional crash. She may also feel pressured if the intensity is very high. This approach doesn’t build attraction it’s one-sided.

Attraction-building approach (showing her why she should like you): Focus on confidence, humor, success, and social appeal the qualities that make someone naturally attractive. Get to know her gradually, have fun conversations, and let her see your best qualities without being desperate. Pros: You increase the chance she feels drawn to you organically. Cons: Takes patience; you can’t just dump all your feelings at once.

Key insight: Right now, your feelings are so intense that they’re clouding your strategy. To actually get to her heart, you need to: Calm your emotional intensity enough to interact naturally. Build attraction through actions, confidence, and shared experiences. Let her come to value your presence, not just your words. Once there’s mutual interest, then it’s safe to express deeper emotions like “I love you.”

If you go full emotional on her now, there’s a risk of scaring her off, especially since she’s in nursing school and focused on her priorities. The smartest move is to step back from the all-consuming crush, focus on being appealing and fun around her, and let her develop feelings naturally.

[Isabella Jones]

hey, your words feel so full of emotion it’s like I can almost feel your heartbeat through them. you’re clearly someone who feels deeply, and that kind of love—the kind that shakes you up inside—doesn’t come often. it sounds like she’s become the center of your thoughts, but the truth is, love isn’t just about wanting someone, it’s also about becoming the kind of person they’d want to stand beside. when a woman sees confidence, calm, and purpose in a man, that’s when she starts to open her heart.

you don’t need to pour all your feelings out at once. start small. let her see your warmth through simple moments, a smile, a thoughtful question about her day, or a quiet gesture that shows you care. that’s how trust and connection grow, not from grand confessions, but from gentle consistency. 💛

can I ask you something? do you think you’re in love with who she really is, or with how she makes you feel when she’s near you?

[PassionSeeker]

You’re feeling a lot right now and that’s okay. When emotions run this deep, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and freeze up. But love doesn’t grow from intensity alone it grows from calm connection. She’s focused on nursing school, so give her space to succeed, but don’t vanish completely. A gentle message like, “Hey, thinking of you hope your studies are going well,” is enough to show care without pressure.

When you do see her, relax. Don’t plan a speech just be present. Ask how she’s doing, listen, and let the conversation flow naturally. The more you focus on her rather than your nerves, the easier it’ll get.

Also, remember that confidence comes from doing, not overthinking. Take small steps a short chat, a coffee invite, a shared laugh. Those moments are what open hearts.

You don’t need grand gestures right now. You just need to show her the real you kind, sincere, and steady. That’s what truly reaches someone’s heart.

[Marcus king]

You’re feeling something real that deep pull that makes your heart race and your stomach twist. It’s clear she means a lot to you, but right now, your emotions are running ahead of your plan. When feelings are that strong, it’s easy to come on too fast and overwhelm her, especially if she’s focused on school.

[Val Unfiltered💋]

oh babe 🥺 you’re *enchanted*. she’s your heartbeat right now, but don’t confuse obsession with connection. you can’t pour from empty so get your own balance back first. stop over-rehearsing the movie in your head. if she’s meant for you, she’ll feel it too. ✨💅

[Tara]

Oh, come on now. You are not going to win her heart by trembling like a lost puppy. What you are feeling is obsession, not love. Love is calm and steady; obsession is desperate and chaotic. Right now, you are feeding the second one.

You say you miss her so much it makes your stomach hurt. That is not romance, that is emotional withdrawal. You are craving her like a fix, and that tells me you have placed your entire sense of worth in her hands. That is not attraction; that is surrender.

If you truly care about her, stop trying to “get to her heart.” Start getting control of your own. Focus on your work, your goals, your discipline. That is what makes someone magnetic, not endless declarations of need.

You cannot love her properly while you are this unstable. When you become the version of yourself that does not beg, panic, or chase, that is when you will have her attention.

[Sally]

When you care about someone that deeply, it’s like your whole body reacts before your brain can slow anything down. But here’s the thing you’re missing in all that emotion. Wanting her this much doesn’t mean she’s yours. And saying “I love you” won’t magically make her feel the same.

If you really want a shot at her heart, you’ve got to breathe first. Slow down. Let her see you, not this panicked version of you that’s scared to lose her. Be steady. Be kind. Be present without pushing.

And if she’s in nursing school, respect the weight she’s carrying. Show her you care by giving her space to focus, not flooding her with the pressure of your feelings.

You don’t win someone over with big speeches. You do it by showing up in a way that feels warm and calm, not overwhelming.

Start there. The rest will be clear once you’re not shaking every time you think of her.

[Natalie Noah]

Reading this, I can feel the intensity of your emotions, it’s clear you really care about her, and the way you describe missing her and feeling physically affected shows just how deep your attachment is. my first thought is that while your feelings are real and powerful, letting them control your actions or overwhelm you will make it harder, not easier, to connect with her. Right now, you’re caught in a space of nervousness and self-doubt, which makes expressing yourself naturally almost impossible. Women are drawn to confidence, calmness, and presence, even more than raw emotion. So the challenge isn’t to suppress your feelings, but to learn how to manage them so you can express them in a way that’s attractive and not overwhelming.

The key is to shift from “I have to tell her how I feel” to “I want to get to know her better and share parts of myself in a meaningful way.” Start small: show interest in her life, listen actively, share experiences, and let your bond grow naturally. If you do want to confess your feelings, consider writing a thoughtful note or letter where you can express yourself clearly without panicking, rather than trying to blurt it out in person when your nerves take over. And most importantly, remember. her response is not a reflection of your worth. Your goal isn’t to force love, it’s to create connection and space for something real to develop over time.

[KeishaMartin]

This is the kind of love-sick, stomach-twisting drama that makes your pulse race and your palms sweat. This guy is trembling at the mere thought of confessing his feelings, heart pounding, stomach knotting like Christmas lights gone haywire. It’s intoxicating and terrifying, he’s on the brink of emotional meltdown, yet absolutely craving connection. And then there’s the ex who’s suddenly confused, needing “time to figure herself out,” leaving him suspended in limbo. It’s like a holiday party gone wrong, cheer on the surface, but behind the glitter, hearts are breaking, nerves are fraying, and the mistletoe is just cruel teasing. Talk about a Christmas heartbreak scenario: you’re alone in the snow, staring at a text that never comes, wondering if love fades like melted snowflakes or lingers like eggnog on your lips.

April Masini’s brilliance shines here. She’s not afraid to tell it straight: nervous trembling isn’t sexy, obsession isn’t romance, and if you want her heart, you’ve got to earn it by being magnetic, confident, and alive in the moment. She’s the ultimate mix of wise, daring, and wickedly honest, like the perfect cocktail at a Christmas party that makes your head spin in the best way. Her advice? Stop letting your feelings paralyze you, step into your power, and play the game of attraction like a master. Because the only thing hotter than love confessed is love earned, tasted, and returned with fiery, mutual passion.

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