[Gilleon]

You see we have been dating for six months now and it was great and everything was going smooth and perfect and we loved each other very much but I got sick and tried to tell her about it but I always was saying things like dying and telling her to forget me if I did die and sometimes I get mad at her for nothing really and she gets angry every time I say the word “die”, and I think I just didn’t hear her that’s why she is confused now.. Last week after Christmas I asked her if she had any problems with me and she said none and she was very happy with me but now on the 1st of January 2017 she says that she is confused at her feelings for me but she doesn’t know why. I tried to ask her if she found someone else but she says it’s not that she’s found someone but she’s just confused about me.

So could you tell me or give me an idea as to why she’s confused?

I have been putting her through an emotional rollercoaster this last month (December 2016) and so I asked if it was because of that and she said it might be, but still its a mystery as to how and why she is confused. I also tried to meet with her but she says that she is still trying to understand about her feelings for me and that she wants to meet to talk about it but she can`t meet and I don`t know why, I`ve given her some space but I still love her very much, we are each other’s first love and there’s no other guy So I just want to get an Insight into her head and how she`s thinking about it, I don`t want to give up because I love her very much but I`m starting to feel differently now.

Please Help.

[AskApril Masini]

You wrote that you’ve put her through an emotional roller coaster. 😕 Nobody likes to be dragged through unnecessary drama. It’s exhausting and it’s consuming. And it takes a toll on the relationship, as you can see. 🙁 This is why she’s telling you she’s confused at her feelings. She’s had enough of the drama and it’s creating a situation for her that makes the relationship not worth her time and energy. 🙁

For future, work on your impulse control when it comes to drama. Try to anticipate the toll your needs are going to take on a partner. This woman is making it clear that she’s under duress because of your emotional roller coasters. Try to live more healthfully and peacefully and you’ll find that you’ll bring health and peace to any and all relationships you’re in as a result. 🙂

[Ethan Morales]

Alright… here’s the truth: when someone says they’re “confused about their feelings,” it’s rarely random. In your case, it’s a direct consequence of the emotional rollercoaster you’ve put her through.

Emotional strain creates confusion All the “dying” talk, mood swings, and getting mad at her for little things? That’s exhausting. Even if she loves you, constantly managing your highs and lows can make her uncertain about her own feelings, because she’s emotionally taxed.

Drama masks love It’s not that she doesn’t care about you. It’s that the stress from your actions fear-inducing statements, intense emotions overshadows the affection she feels. Confusion often comes from needing mental space to separate love from emotional exhaustion.

Space is necessary She’s asking for space because she needs time to process her emotions without being overwhelmed. Pressuring her to meet or explain herself won’t clarify things it will likely make the confusion worse.

Responsibility is key You have to take responsibility for your own emotional stability. That means anticipating the impact your words and moods have on her, controlling impulses, and minimizing unnecessary drama. If you can’t do that, the relationship will stay strained.

Long-term solution Focus on creating a stable, peaceful, and supportive environment both for yourself and your partner. Love thrives when it’s nurtured, not when one person feels like they’re constantly walking on eggshells.

Her confusion isn’t about you suddenly being less lovable; it’s about the emotional turbulence she’s been navigating with you. Give her space, show you’re working on stability, and when she sees that calm and consistency, clarity often follows naturally.

If you keep the drama, you’ll keep the confusion. Stability, patience, and self-control are your only real paths forward here. If you want, I can outline a practical plan to regain her trust and stabilize your relationship. Do you want me to do that?

[Marcus king]

It makes sense that she’s confused and honestly, your situation explains a lot. When you got sick, you began talking about dying, pulling away emotionally, and then swinging back. Even if you didn’t mean to, that puts someone in a very intense and unstable emotional space. When someone you love keeps saying things like “forget me if I die,” it can trigger fear, sadness, and emotional exhaustion. She wasn’t just being your girlfriend she was trying to hold your emotional world together. That’s a heavy burden.

Now her “confusion” is likely not about whether she cares. She probably still cares deeply. Her confusion is about whether she can feel safe and emotionally stable in the relationship. Love needs calm. Love needs a sense of security. And the last month, she hasn’t felt that. She’s probably tired not in a dramatic way just drained.

When she says she needs time to understand her feelings, it usually means this:
She needs space to breathe and see if she can reconnect to how the relationship felt before the emotional rollercoaster.

Right now, the worst thing you can do is push, ask repeatedly, or try to “fix” her feelings.

[Tara]

You exhausted her. You dragged her through a month of emotional chaos, death talk, mood swings, fear, guilt, and pressure, and now you’re acting surprised that her feelings don’t feel the same. Love doesn’t survive when one person keeps threatening the stability of the relationship, even indirectly. Every time you said “forget me if I die,” you weren’t being poetic you were dumping emotional weight on her shoulders that she never asked to carry.

She’s not confused. She’s tired. She’s overwhelmed. She’s mentally stepping back to protect herself, but she’s softening the message so she doesn’t break your heart. When someone says “I’m confused,” it usually means “I don’t feel the way I used to, but I’m not ready for the fight that comes with saying it.”

And here’s the harsh part: you saying you’re “starting to feel differently now” is just damage control. You want reassurance, not clarity. Her distance isn’t a mystery it’s a reaction. You’ve been unstable, dramatic, and emotionally heavy, and she’s pulling away because she doesn’t feel safe anymore.

Your verdict: stop trying to climb inside her head. Take responsibility for what you created. Give her real space not texting-every-few-days “space,” but actual silence. Fix your emotional regulation before trying to fix a relationship you’ve already pushed to the edge.

If she comes back, it’ll be because she feels stability, not desperation. If she doesn’t, then this was the cost of ignoring the impact of your behavior.

[Sally]

This does not sound mysterious at all. She is overwhelmed. You scared her without meaning to. When someone you love keeps talking about dying, pulling back, pushing you away, then getting mad for no real reason, it puts them on edge. It makes them feel like the ground under them is not steady anymore.

She did not fall out of love overnight. She just got tired and emotionally worn out. Six months of good memories cannot cancel out a month of feeling scared, helpless, or unsure what version of you she was going to get.

That kind of rollercoaster makes anyone pull back and question their feelings.
Give her real space. Not texts checking in, not pressure to explain. Let things settle. And honestly, take care of yourself first, because whatever made you talk like that came from a place that needs attention.

If she comes back, let it be because things feel calmer, not because you pushed.

[Natalie Noah]

She’s feeling overwhelmed and emotionally drained. When you repeatedly bring up extreme things like dying, or react with anger over small matters, it puts a huge emotional weight on her. Even though she cares for you and loves you, she’s trying to process her own feelings while being pulled into these high-stress moments. Her confusion isn’t about another person. it’s about the emotional rollercoaster she’s experiencing with you, and it’s making her pause to reassess how she wants to continue in this relationship.

What you need to focus on now is giving her consistent calm and stability. That means stopping the dramatic statements, managing your impulses, and showing that you can handle your emotions without overwhelming her. Love isn’t just about feelings. it’s about how you create safety and peace together. If you work on this for yourself first, it will naturally make the relationship healthier and may help her feel secure enough to reconnect fully without the confusion clouding her mind. Right now, space and self-regulation are the most loving things you can do for both of you.

[Member]

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