[ohiogrl1076]

Hi.. I need help. I met at great Guy October of 09.. I just got out of a 3 year relationship when I met this Guy.. my neighbor…he wanted something more than what I wanted right away… even though the way I felt bout him I just didn’t wanna rush into anything… we saw each other all the time but I did go out with friends and yes a Guy also… but it wasn’t anything. This mad him upset and we stopped seeing each other…after a month maybe a little longer I realize my neighbor was the one and we got back together may 2010 and engaged september 2010…Everything going good. Now here is my problem I have 3 kids 21 18 and 16 the two younger ones home with me. He had 2 kids 18 and 16 he gets the 16 year old every other weekend.. when he had him I spend time with his son. I stay at his home. But he doesn’t spend anytime with my kids or at my home.. I live next to him..walk out his door and 10 steps your at my house. I’d never see this Guy if I didn’t go to his place. He also doesn’t wanna do anything as a family… Christmas he does with his kids then me… my kids not involved. Thanksgiving… he will say if my boys are going to there dads I’m more than welcomed to come to his family dinner if the boys are home then he will text me when he is home. Told me once that if my boys decided to live with there dad that I could move in with him then 2 days later told me that he changed his mind cause where would my boys stay when they came to visit I said the spare bedroom but he said that’s where his kids sleep and he doesn’t like sharing beds… I have also found that he was emailing another girl I saw his email account and saw the going out messages to her and her emaing back . I asked him bout this he said he never did it that this girl emailed and made it look like it came from him… I gave him the benefit of the doubt just cause I’m so in love with him. I don’t trust him cause of that info I found out… I’m afraid of maybe hoping for something that really ain’t gonna happen.. I would think by now being engaged and all that the relationship should be in a different level by now… but have the time it doesn’t even feel like were engaged.. it feels more like friends that see each other and have some fun.. we don’t even make love anymore… and trust me its not me I am always suggesting he is always (something) I’m so sad and unhappy.. all I wanna do is be with all the time like a relationship.do things as a family even if its just sometimes.. Please help me…

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I’m very sorry you’re sad and disappointed. 🙁 It sounds like your fiance doesn’t want to blend families. In fact, he’s made that very clear. When you’re a single parent, dating is different than when you’re a single adult without children. Kids add layers of joy — and complications. They’re a compatibility point, and for the two you, there is not enough compatibility when it comes to blending your family. Blending your families is a deal breaker. He’s not willing to compromise, and neither are you.

I’m afraid that this isn’t a good match for you based simply on this very big issue. I’m sorry — but you’ll be much happier with someone who loves your children and who loves you and who wants you to love his children as well. I know it’s difficult, but you can find someone who is a better match for you. 😉

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 🙂

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