[bobbi]

was with my man for 2 years until he left me in may 2010 as he had met someone else although we kept in touch.2 months later we started meetin up as friendsm him sayin she was out his life,and he had only done it to push me away.We were gettin on well ( i was over th moon to have him bak in my life) and started sleeping together another month later.At this point i trusted his word and never doubted him, that was until found her at his place 1 night after he said he would meet me, he was ignoring my calls so i went to his and there they were. The next day he told me she just a mate, he was bored so text her t pop up, as a mate and i believed (let myself) him, how stupid looking back now.That was in august, we were still seeing eachother but it seemed so casual compared t before the split (another sign i ignored), and i had a gut feeling something jus wasnt right.1 mornin In october i logged into facebook and my world fell apart again, she had written love-notes on his wall and put that she was in a relationship, her mate asked who, she wrote my mans name. I nearly had a breakdown, couldnt get out of bed, jus could not believe it.After a few days of hearin how it me he wants, she nothin i let him back in again only to find her at his place in november.He swore that was las tym, new year new start he said yet iv still had that naggin feeling eating away because of how he is towards me at times, like ive been crying bout something, looking to him for comfort & get nothing.AL this led to me goin through his mobile lastnight only to find he still has her number, but the devastating thing is that he saved her num under ‘Sarah babe xx”.i gave him my new number yesterday and its saved ‘rhian’. I havent said anything to him yet as i feel so bad for snooping in his things yet i cant put into words how much it hurts, its like my worst fear has been proven true, that she is his babe, not me.advise would be great, im so weak from living this 18 months of hell, i just dont know how to handle it.thanks for reading 🙁

[AskApril Masini]

It sounds like you really need a flashing neon sign that says, “He’s not interested in you enough to be monogamous!” Maybe then you’ll get it. He’s given you so many clues along the way that he isn’t really interested in you, but you keep ignoring them.

Some of the mistakes you’ve made along the way are: when he left you for another woman after you’d been dating for two years, you shouldn’t have kept in touch with him. He’d found someone else, and you should have decided you were ready for a man who wanted you! When you stay in touch with an ex, it’s a lot harder to move on, but clearly you didn’t want to. 🙁 Then when you started to meet up “as friends” he told you he’d only started dating the other woman “to push you away” 😯 you should have run for the door. How about a simple, “This isn’t working out?” instead of having to date someone else just to get some space. 😕 Then he’s ignoring your calls. Another flashing red light, but instead of taking the rejection for what it was — you went to his house. 😮 You should never have chased him after he rejected you (again). And you find a woman there when he’s ignored your calls — I’m not sure why you didn’t see the writing on the wall then. After that it was one mistake after another.

Bottom line, you need to move on. This guy has got you as his doormat. But it’s by mutual consent.

Read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], and learn how to get a man by being the woman he wants! It will help you a lot. 🙂

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